Wildfire - H.S

33

Mum always told me that falling in love is the easiest thing in the world to do, which makes it the most dangerous.

Because once it happens, you can't turn back. You can't give up on it.

And if it's the wrong person, it will destroy you.

I always felt slightly cautious of the concept of love after that.

But as the years slowly went on, I understood that there is a difference between loving a person and being in love with them.

Your soulmate is the person you are meant to fall in love with. And everyone else, you can simply love.

But this girl is doing things to me I'd never think to have imagined. And she really is the most gorgeous girl. With the kindest soul.

The way she treats everyone, without expecting a single thing in return.

As Dani would say, she treats people with kindness.

I always have had an irrational fear of never actually finding someone who cares for me, the way you always get told someone will.

It wasn't as bad when I was younger.

But when One Direction began, everything in my life switched.

Do people like me for me, or for the fame and luxuries that are attached to my name?

And the anxiety only got worse, because I started to think more about if I even have a soulmate. Because how can there be one girl out there who will be in love with every part of me? I don't doubt I'd love her like that, but can it be reciprocated?

I try not to think about her too much, she still sings in my head all the time. Hopelessly Devoted To You being what I can only presume her favorite song. Either that or she's in theatre, because it is all she ever sings.

I just feel so guilty, because Evie is slowly becoming my everything. She's in everything I do, occupies my every thought.

It's not as though I actively went out searching for a girlfriend. Even after I met Evie, I wasn't trying to turn it into something more than it was.

It all happened so naturally because it felt right. Nothing with her feels forced, or premature.

It feels as though it's meant to be exactly how it is.

Which is probably what makes it so much more scarier, because I know one day I'll have to let her go.

She hasn't brought up the topic of soulmates yet, and I've been purposefully putting it off, because I'm scared of what she might say.

"So what do you think?" She smiles down at the silk dress, hanging off her hips. Her hands are grasped to the soft yellow material, swaying it from side to side as she does the same with her body.