Hermione x Fem Reader One-Shots

Dirty Pick-up Lines

*Slytherin Y/N wants Hermione's attention by being cute. Need I say more?*

           "Do you believe in love at first sight? Or should I walk past you again?" you asked, grinning. Hermione rolled her eyes, still sitting in the library, nose in a book. You would rather her nose be somewhere else (wink wonk).

           "If I were a cat, I would spend all nine lives with you." Hermione sighed. "First of all, cats having nine lives is a myth. Second, if you were a cat, who said I would adopt you?" Oof. Next one. 

         "Can I borrow a kiss? I promise I'll give it back!" Hermione narrowed her eyes and concentrated harder on her book. You sighed. Next pick-up line.

          "Can you give me a picture? I want to prove to my friends that angels really do exist." Hermione looked confused, still reading as she replied. "Wait...you have friends?" Ouch. Ugh, try again.

        "Forget chocolate, I'd rather have one of your kisses to recover from a Dementor attack!" Hermione giggled. "Maybe." Good work. Now to try for more attention.

      "Your smile is like Expelliarmus. Simple, yet disarming." Hermione rolled her eyes and smiled, but kept her eyes on the book. Next one!

        "Are you using the Confundus Charm, or are you just naturally mind blowing?" Hermione finally lifted her eyes from her book, then stood up, shoved you into the seat next to her, then she sat down again, smirking and looking into your eyes.

         "I bet I don't need to cast Accio to make you come." You flushed red, knowing good and well what she meant by that. Hermione continued. "I'm not wearing an invisiblity cloak, but do you think I could still visit your restricted section tonight?"

          Your face grew even more red. Merlin, this girl. "Would you like to be my Horcrux? Because I would love to get a piece of me inside of you." Her voice was husky and mesmerizing, and you felt yourself get aroused. Get it together!

         "I wish you were my school work, so I could do you on a table." Hermione's eyes gleamed with mischief and lust. "One night with me and they'll be calling you Moaning Myrtle." You bit your lip and crossed your legs.

           "I don't need Aguamenti to make you wet." You blushed as she stood up and grabbed her book, kissed you on the cheek, then teasingly walked out. But before she walked away from you, she whispered, "If you want some real attention, meet me in my room at midnight." When she had walked out, you placed a hand on your chest and breathed out the words, "Woah daddy." And since it was 11:30 at night, you went to your room to prepare for "attention".

A/N:Receipts or no?