You/Historia Reiss - Second

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You watched Historia talk about what to do with the books, unable to deal with the fact that this was the same Historia that drooled all over Ymir's shoulder. 

"(y/n)! They're talking to you!"

Armin whispers harshly to you. Your eyes widen the slightest bit as you look around to find who was talking to you. 

"My sincerest apologizes, my queen. I was momentarily distracted."

Historia looks at you disapprovingly, making you sink further into your chair. 

"Would you mind sharing with the court what's more important than this?" You could feel everyone's stares and all you could do was hope that your blush wasn't noticeable. Gulping loudly, you shake your head. "Very well then. As I was saying. I'd like for you to write the report of what was found. This report will be handed to the press so that it can be released to everyone."

"As you wish."

The court is soon adjourned and it's just you and Armin alone in the room. 

"What was that all about?"

"What?"

"Historia didn't need to call you out like that. It looked like she wanted to embarrass you or something like that."

"I wouldn't say that. Historia is not like that."

Armin nods and begins to head towards the exit. 

"Alright. You should go find her then. The two of you have a lot to talk about for the report."

"Thanks. I'll see you later."

X

'You can enter."

You walk in to find Historia reading the letter that Reiner had insisted it was important for her to read. 

"I came at a bad time?"

"No, please sit."

Historia folds the letter and returns it back to its case. She walks over to sit besides you. 

"So we can..."

"I don't want to talk about the books."

"Oh, uh, then what did you want to talk about?"

"Ymir's letter."

You felt your hands start to sweat from your nerves. You never liked being alone with Historia because of the way she made you feel. 

"What about Ymir's letter? I never read it if that's what you're asking."

"No. I wasn't going to ask that. I just wanted you to confirm something with me."

"Of course, was it it?"

"Ymir mentioned how you've been in love with me since we were cadets"

"What?! That's not true! Leave it to Ymir to continue messing with me even when she's not here."

Historia genuinely laughs for the first time. It had been a while since she's smiled. 

"With the way you're blushing, I think you're the one that's lying."

"Historia, I..."

She lets her hand rest on top of yours, making your brain short circuit and stop you from being able to utter a single word. 

"It's okay. I suspected as much after what happened in the tower. Do you know what Ymir told me in her letter?"

"No. What did she say?"

"She told me her biggest regret was that she didn't marry me and that she wasn't going to let someone make the same mistakes as her. She said that I needed to move on, to forget about her and be with someone that would would love me almost as much as she loved me." Your heart starts feel like it's beating at a million miles per hour as she talks. You didn't know where she was going with this. "But I'm afraid that I can't move on. Ymir always talked about living for myself and that's what I will be doing. I'm not ready to move on and I don't think I ever will. I have no doubt in my mind that we would have married in another lifetime but I'm afraid this is the lifetime we're living in. The one where I die alone because Ymir sacrificed herself to save me."

You had accepted the fact that you were never going to stand a chance to be with Historia but it still hurt to hear what she had to say. Removing your hand off of her, you grab the papers and pen that had been set out for you. 

"I understand, your majesty. I've always known that I never stood a chance. Thank you for giving me closure. Will it be alright if I step out for a minute. I just need to compose myself. "

Historia wanted to reach out and comfort you but she knew it was just going to make things worse. 

"Take as much time as you need."

You bow before her and make a beeline to the exit. You're barely able to close the door before you breakdown. 

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