Chapter 37: The Last Good Night

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Dedicated Chapter Song: Now or Never - Halsey

I don't wanna fight right now
Know you always right, now
Know I need you 'round with me
But nobody waitin' 'round with me
(Hiromi)

I don't wanna fight right nowKnow you always right, nowKnow I need you 'round with meBut nobody waitin' 'round with me(Hiromi)

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I struggled to hide how much pain physically and mentally I was in each day. My routine for three weeks was to get up, make an appearance at breakfast, pretend to eat, throw it all up an hour later, then show up to practice.

However, thanks to never being able to consume proper nutrients, I always fell short in training. Even if I tried my absolute hardest, my mind would just wander, leaving me pinned to the ground by Aizawa-sensei.

Some days ago I finally received word that Master Yang had committed suicide. It left me heartbroken, as the man was practically a father to me. I knew nothing of his personal life, however. He was close to my family, having been an ex-boyfriend of my mother's and a good friend even after they broke up.

I had only assumed that maybe he did it because he had a wife who left him, or maybe he had cancer, but I wouldn't know for sure. Yet, it seemed so strange to me. He was a strong man with a strong will. Deep down I knew, there was no way he would commit suicide.

I think after a while people started to notice my depression. Whenever the others would go relax in the onsen or hang out making s'mores by a rising fire, I stayed inside my private room, preferring to read or just be alone with my thoughts.

Of course, I was never really alone.

Kaito hadn't visited since that night. With every passing day I questioned who he was, how he found me, and when he would return. Some nights from my window I could peak out and see some of the students still training. I turned my head when I saw bright flames light up the forest, then simmer down in an instant.

"Kch," I shut the window and fell back onto my bed. "I want to go home." I would repeat that to myself over and over again. One more week and I could hide inside my mansion for hours, never needing to speak to anyone for days. I was happy, but not really. There is no happiness in being utterly alone.

At some point during the free time portion of the evening, someone knocked on my door. One of my shadows whispered to me that it was YaoMomo, so I just ignored her. "Hiro," she knocks again. "I brought you some cupcakes."

If there's one thing I hated to eat, it was sugary sweets. All that deliciousness wrapped up into something so beautifully crafted and yet I could never enjoy the taste. Not while I was like this.

"Not hungry," I called back to her.

Momo casts a glance at the others outside the door. "I," she places her hand on the wood separating us. "didn't see you at dinner tonight. You feeling okay?"

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