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"When my heart is beating for you

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"When my heart is beating for you..."
- LeeHi, Crush, "For You"

"What are you staring at?"

I jolt back suddenly, looking over at her. Shaking my hands briefly to show her I was just looking at thin air, she raises an eyebrow. I glance over at Eunwoo, who still stands there like an idiot. What are you doing dude, run! I mean, if you want to escape this brutal woman turned nice, that is. Yet then again, we're still on the topic of Sana giving up everything for her social status, you know?

Because apparently social status still applies in Joseon. (Fact check, of course, it does... you have ranks here, stupid Youra.)

Anyway, Sana crosses her arms, her head beckoning to the outside of the palace. "Later, shall we go with Seungwan to town? We can get you some new attire. Your confidence in wearing that is awfully outstanding." Her words baffle me, knowing that her comment was a back-handed compliment. I guess that still works around here."

"Why not? You make me feel so kind," I retort with my own back-handed compliment, trying to resist the urge to roll my eyes. Even after we had our nice, girl-to-girl talk, she still can't resist being mean. I don't blame her though, too much kindness gets a little too... icky- and that comes from someone who's used to being nice in exchange for some good fortune.

Again, the fact that I'm stupidly unfortunate never leaves my mind. Maybe it's just me, you know? What if my birth is the reason I've been so unfortunate? Should I just die? No, that's stupid. What are you thinking, Youra!? You've lived two decades just for you to give up now? That's dumb. You, Youra, are dumb-

"Youra, you should go sleep now," Yeonjun enters my sight, beaming like a child before he drags himself along the palace hall, humming to himself as he dances around. He seems happy. "Remind me to work on my exercise, Youra." I hear, my eyes meeting Chanyeol's, who got beat cruelly by Eunwoo- who walks next to him. The second youngest meets my eyes, bowing his head lightly as he suddenly turns his head- and by his childish acts, he must be avoiding Sana.

Not only do I notice it, but Sana does, too. She huffs, mumbling incoherent words to herself as her eyes pierce daggers into the back of Eunwoo's head, causing me to stifle my laugh at their babyish behavior. They're probably the same age, but they act like little kids in their first stage of puppy love. Not going to lie, we're all like this- we treat love like puppy love.

Even I'm petty. 

However, their case is different- they're both in love, however, both want different things from each other. While I know what Sana wants (her high status and riches), I have no idea what Eunwoo wants besides Sana. Does he want social status as well? Happiness? I mean, it's obvious he wants Sana and loves her, but what if he wants something other than that?

Ah, nevermind. Too many questions, no answers. I am technically the outcast of the old-age friend group here. By many ways.

I head off to my bedroom, but as I open the door, I immediately flinch. "Yeonjun!? What are you doing in here?!"

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