Losing Game/// James Potter

Chapter 18

The next morning James had woken up extra early,  half because he couldn't sleep and half because he couldn't get the thoughts of what happened last night out of his head. After Elsie had ran out on him, he stayed up talking with Lily for a little bit to make sure she was okay. But, the whole time his mind kept going back to his small, brunette friend. Elsie was stuck in his brain. It was almost as if he could still taste her soft lips and breath in the soft lull of vanilla that engulfed her body.

He was more confused than he had ever been. He loved Lily, but Elsie was all he could think about. So, he woke up early to talk about it with the people he'd trust his life with: his friends. He walked all the way to the Gryffindor tower and slipped through the portrait entrance, hoping he wouldn't see anyone else he knew up this early. But when he walked in, his eyes locked on a sight that made his stomach twist.

Elsie was curled up on the couch in Rory's lap, sleeping as if she'd never been more at peace. He wanted to reach out, steal her from his grasp, keep her safe from him. But, his face fell and he pulled away. She was never his to give or take.

James brushed off his thoughts and began walking towards the stairs, not wanting to be caught staring at Elsie and Rory, when a voice called out to him.

"Oi, Potter," a sleepy Rory called out in a deep voice, "Get your arse over here and make sure she stays sleeping. I've been up all night trying to make sure she's okay from something that you probably did to her."

"What do you mean? All night?," James froze in place, eyes locked on the sleeping girl in Rory's arms. He turned around and made his way back to the two.

Rory cut him off, too tired to deal with James right now, "I don't want to hear any of your shit excuses, just bloody stay with her so I can get more than one hour of sleep."

James nodded and slipped in next to the girl as Rory did the opposite.

As he sat down, Elsie's eyes fluttered open to see James' face above hers. "James?" She tiredly croaked, "What are you doing here?"

She sat up and got off of his lap that she was sleeping on, moving to sit on the right side of him tucked under his arm. James absentmindedly wrapped his arm around her body and slumped back into the couch.

"McLaggen just left to go get some sleep and I agreed to stay with you," he softly spoke, refusing to make eye contact with the girl.

"Thanks," she smiled up at him, trying to avoid the topic of last night. However, James thought the exact opposite way. He needed to apologize to her.

"Els...erm... about last night...," James trailed off, his eyes trained on his free hand that was playing with the hem of his shirt.

"James, we don't have to-," Elsie was cut off by the spectacled boy who finally brought his gaze to meet hers.

"I know we don't have to," James started speaking in an apologetic tone, "But, I want to. I'm so sorry, Els. I don't know what has gotten into me. I've been so...so off lately."

He sighed as he continued talking, "You're allowed to talk to whoever you want, and I should have respected your privacy. And, I shouldn't have snogged you... again."

Elsie appreciated his apology, and even though she wished that James snogged her because he wanted to and not due to frustration, she couldn't stay mad at him. If Elsie pushed James away like Snape pushed Lily away, she would have nothing. James was her everything, and so if only being friends is what it takes to keep him in her life, she was going to respect that.

She let out a small chuckle while looking at the normally goofy boy who was now dead serious, "I forgive you, James. I couldn't stay mad at you even if I wanted to."