Haikyuu X reader

Chapter 7-Watermelon

So I'm on medication now for my anxiety and depression 😐. Yay.

   So the first four sets of the day were a real struggle. For me.
   I don't know if it was the bad night of sleep, or they were annoyed with me for practicing without them, but my team seemed really mad at me today. I didn't get any sets, and anything I did was met with glares and sarcastic comments.
   The team managers treated us with watermelons for lunch outside, which I would have thought was really sweet of them, but I was still really tired and too annoyed to really care. I sat alone against the school wall, trying to avoid the seeds.
I don't even like watermelon.
    "Hey, are you okay?" Someone came up to me and sat down. "You seemed off today."
   "Akaashi, I don't really want to talk right now. I'm tired."
    "Alright, can I sit?"
   I nodded, too close to tears to speak.
   I picked out the rest of the seeds and threw them as hard as I could. After that, I felt a little better.
   "I don't get it," I mumbled.
   "I know," Akaasshi whispered. It's sad that he knew exactly what I was talking about. I rested my head on his shoulder and decided that it was okay to let one tear fall.
   Then I realized that it was a mistake to cry in front of a ton of guys, and my team, so I immediately wiped it away. Not fast enough.
   "(Y/N) what's wrong?" Hinata ran over to us. I shook my head and angled it to where he couldn't see my face.
   "Nothing, I'm okay, just tired."
   "Why are you crying then?"
   "Hinata," Akaashi said to him. "Now is not the time."
   I think Akaashi gave him the death stare or something, because Hinata just walked away without any fighting.
   "I hope you feel better," he said to me, and then he just left.
   "Thank you," I managed to whisper to Akaashi. He shifted and put his arm around my shoulder.
   By this time, one would wonder if Akaashi and I were an item, but we're not. He's more like a super affectionate brother to me. He's so important to me, and I love him, but he'll never be anything more than a brother.
   And he's not normally very affectionate or touchy-feely, but he knows how touch-starved I am at home, and he likes to make up for that.
   Now that made it sound like I have a terrible life, but I really don't. My parents divorced when I was really young, so I never really knew my actual dad, but my mom remarried a couple years ago, and my step dad was really nice. I accepted it a long time ago.
   It's just that my family isn't all that close. My mom and step dad are very busy with work, and they often travel. My brother is closed off as well, he really only has me for support, but he's younger, so it's normally me who's doing the comforting.
   But when I cry up in my room at night, I have no one. When I have panic attacks in the school bathroom, I have no one but Akaashi or Bokuto to talk to. And I'm so glad they understand, otherwise, I have no idea what I'd do.
   Bokuto even knows to be quiet when I'm upset. He learned that lesson in a very unpleasant way. These two boys are so caring and loving, and the fact thatI have them makes me the luckiest person in the world.
   "You know that we have to go in soon."
   I nodded and closed my eyes and sighed. I didn't want to go back inside.
   "Fine. But tell Bokuto I'm not practicing tonight."
   "I will, but I can't promise a calm reaction. I can tell him how you've been feeling."
   "Fine, but just make sure no one else knows. The last thing I want is a pity party. I just want to sleep."
   "I can do that for you."
   He pressed a kiss to my temple and got up. He held out his hand and I took it to hoist myself into a standing position.
    In order to lighten the mood, I gave him a light punch on the arm.
    "Hey, thanks."
    "Anytime," he said, his face reverting back to his blank, nonchalant expression.
    "HEY (Y/N)!" Bokuto yelled from across the yard. He was heading into the gym. "WE PLAY YOU NEXT GET READY FOR US TO WIPE THE FLOOR WITH YOU!"
   Akaashi frowned. " I could ask him to cool off for that set."
   I shook my head. "Nah, make him hit harder, K? It'll feel good to have that blocking sting."
We didn't speak as we walked into the gym. I made eye contact with Daichi. They were full of pity and concern. Hinata must have told everyone on the team that something was off. He gave me that look that asked me if I was ok, and I just nodded in response.
   It was obvious that he didn't believe that, but I turned away. Daichi seemed like such a mom, and that wasn't necessarily a bad thing, but sometimes it's good that people don't know what you're feeling.    However moms go and ruin that peaceful feeling you have when you're alone. They'll hunt you down and stuff cookies down your throat to make you feel better.
   Of course that's not bad all the time. There's a reason people look up to them.
   I headed to where the rest of my team was warming up for the second part of the day. Again, I was met with glares. My partner didn't even look at me. She only talked with the others. So I just went through the motions and focused on keeping my tears in my eyes.
   Obigawa was a solid win, although they put up a fight, the ending score was 25-21.
Karasuno's girl's team was an easy win, the ending score being 25-12.
   Karasuno's boy's team was a win as well, but the ending score was 25-18. They were kinda starting to piss me off, especially because Hinata got a quick attack past me. That was the first time in the time I've played them. I'm blaming it on the lack of sleep.
   Hinata got so happy when he landed that one. He and Kageyama celebrated as if they had just won Nationals, which made me happy in turn. I reached under the net to give them both a high five.
   "Good job you guys!" I praised them. "Next time it won't happen though."
   They both gave me their enthusiastic high fives and Hinata scoffed.
   "If I can get past you once, I can do it again."
   "(Y/N)!" Nanami's voice snapped.
   I turned around slowly.
   "You need to get those! And stop socializing with the opponent!" All of the team stood there, arms crossed and totally pissed.
   I'll give them the socializing with the opponent thing, but I lost one block. One. Out of like the 50 hits that were thrown at me by those two, I missed only one. I can't get all of them.
   I didn't miss another quick attack that set, but nobody cared. By the end of it, I was dying, and out of breath, because Kageyama picked up on how tired I was, so he started setting Hinata up again, but I kept up. I was determined to prove myself.
   But of course, I didn't.
Nekoma lost to us 25-17. As I explained before, we figured out that they leave spaces open when protecting their setter. All we had to do was go to those spots. And when I got back to serve, Lev was on the court and still had no idea what he was doing when it came to float serves, so I got three aces in a row until their libero started receiving for him.
   That was our last set of the day, so the team packed up afterward and left. I packed up a little slower since I had no desire to walk with them. However, a slow pack-up came with Hinata bounding over to invite me to practice.
   "Hey (Y/N), did you see that one spike?"
   "Yeah, Little Red, I was there," I said, not even trying to hide my annoyance. I'm kinda glad that he didn't pick up on it though.
   "You should come practice with us tonight!"
   "Oh, I'm sorry, I don't think I can."
   "Are you practicing with Bokuto and Kuroo?"
   "No, I'm just tired, I need some rest."
   His eyes became concerned. "Hey, are you okay?"
   I nodded and turned away so he wouldn't see my eyes. "Yeah, I'm fine, I'm just tired. I got a bad night of sleep last night. So I'll turn in early and start strong tomorrow."
   "C'mon, practice with us, you can get plenty of sleep later. I know you're sad for some reason, but volleyball always makes me feel better."
   "Hinata I'll practice with you tomorrow. I promise, just please let me off for today."
   Hinata's frown was so heartbreaking, it made me want to stay.
   "Okay... well I hope you feel better tomorrow."
   I nodded and went to walk away, but before I could, another person ran up to me, wrapped their giant arms around me, and lifted me up. It wasn't the crazy hug that Bokuto normally gives me, so Akaashi already told him.
   My feet were still off the ground when he whispered into my ear, "How are you doing?"
   I closed my eyes and shook my head as I hugged him back. He gave me a small squeeze and put me down, his arms still around me. I think he waved Hinata away before he could say anything, because he took his hand off my back for an instant, and I heard footsteps walking away.
   I could feel both of Karasuno's team's eyes burning into my back. The girl's team stayed behind to talk to the others.
   "You should go practice," I mumbled.
   "Wait, I'll walk you to the cafeteria first."
   "Akaashi is probably waiting."
   "He'll understand."
   I nodded, so he moved to pick up my bag and came back to put one of his gigantic arms around me and walked me out of the gym. We ate dinner in the cafeteria together, talking about good plays that we made earlier that day. He made more plays than I did.
   "How are you doing now?" he asked as we finished up with our meals. I had a burger, and Bokuto just had a snack so that he could practice later without any discomfort.
   "Better," I lied. I felt fine but I knew that once Bokuto left, I'd be alone again. Alone with my thoughts and alone with my faults. "You can go practice now."
   "You sure?"
   "Yeah, go practice, I'll be fine."
   He gave me one last concerned look, then jumped up  and sprinted out of the room.
   I was alone.

Hope y'all enjoyed. Again, I am so sorry if this is inaccurate, but I just wanna write, and I don't have the energy for it to be factually accurate anymore. And sorry for any typos.