Omae Wa Mou Shindeiru [DISCONTINUED]

33: Are You Sure You Wanna Ride This Train?

Warning: Offensive humor is ahead since you're conversing with other Gen Z youngsters!

♪───Ｏ（≧∇≦）Ｏ────♪

"You fool!" (F/n) shouts at your friend, Cole, "Your attempt to intimidate me has only made me more horny!"

What the fuck.

"I'm not a psychologist," Cole speaks up, "But you're fucked up."

"Asshole! If you really are my friend, you'll let me pee on you," (F/n) adds.

Okay, seriously. What the fuck.

"(Y/n), we're here. What now?" Cole's voice breaks you out of your train if thought.

Huh?

You look around and finally get your bearings.

Right. You, (F/n), and Cole were planning on hanging out at Peter Piper Pizza for your 15th birthday today. You three just arrived and they're waiting for your orders, because even though it's your birthday, you're paying for it.

"Gomen'nasai. Hidoi yume o mita yōna ki ga shimasu." You mumble as you rub your eyes with your palms.

"What the fuck did you just say?" (F/n) blinks at your words.

"Dude, I think she was speaking Chinese," Cole informs.

"No, you dumb-ass!" (F/n) scoffs before lightly hitting Cole's chest, "That was Vietnamese!"

"You guys are both stupid and racist. It's Japanese." You cut in.

"You're such a weeb."

"Since when did you know Japanese?" Cole laughs.

You went to reply, but you didn't know how to answer that. When did you learn Japanese?

"Been watching too much anime," You decide to say.

"Weeb!" (F/n) teases.

"But what did you say?" Cole asks.

"Oh, I was-I just remembered what I dreamed about this morning."

"Yeah? What was it about?" (F/n) hums in interest.

"Ehh, I don't—wanna talk about it."

"What if Martin Luther King Jr. had said that?" (F/n) huffs before impersonating said man, "I had a dream... but I don't wanna talk about it."

You cover your face as you laugh, "You're fucked up!"

"Hey, I think I nailed that impression!"

Cole nods in agreement, "Yep! Just like Jesus Christ, you nailed it."

"Oh my Goshh," You groan, "You guys are both going to Hell!"

"Want me to say hi to your mom when I'm there?" (F/n) teases.

"Oh ha-ha!" You give a genuine laugh after, "But no, she might show you embarrassing pictures and I know I'll never live it down."

"Come on girls!" Cole sighs as he pushes you and (F/n) forward, "We can bitch about Hell after we go inside it."

——

"My name is Pete, and I like feet. Everytime I see them, I beat my meat." (F/n) sings as you all wait in line to order.

"Stay one million feet away from me," Cole scrunches up his nose.

"ONE MILLION FEET!!" (F/n) moans dramatically into Cole's ear.