aftertaste || poetry

012 - twelve months

themes: trauma, loss, grief

one month goes by

and i feel guilt

was this somehow my fault

did i leave you on the dance floor

two months go by

and i feel hope

i see the cross your father built

i know you're with Him

three months go by

and i feel love

i care enough for myself

to try to fix my heart

four months go by

and i feel strength

the sun shines through my window

i think i can get up today

five months go by

and i feel nostalgia

it's been a long year

you deserve to be here

six months go by

and i feel reflection

you taught me as we walked together

i still grow after you've left

seven months go by

and i feel anxiety

evil seeks me every day

it knows how to find me in my dreams

eight months go by

and i feel longing

i miss your love and laughter

but nothing can bring you back

nine months go by

and i feel inspiration

i carry your lessons with me

more people are finding your story

ten months go by

and i feel depression

i'm seeing new places and peoples

you should have come too

eleven months go by

and i feel mania

how much can a person lose themself

in order to feel control again

twelve months go by

and i feel loneliness

nobody knows what i've seen

i walk on my own with my feelings