Chapter 21

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Only our pillow knows the amount of emotion and hurt we hide from the world...

Flora's Pov

The thunderous storm from outside woke me up and I slowly opened my eyes

I looked around and looked at the time to only see that it was past two in the morning

Ohh

And I suddenly remembered all the events that took place yesterday and my heart drowned again

I was wearing my yesterday's clothes so I went to my bathroom and stood in front of my mirror

And my face was swollen...so swollen and I was pale...my eyes were puffy and dangerously red

I then washed my face before taking a cold shower and changing into sweatpant and hoodie

I then went outside to the balcony were there are only two wood chairs

The rain was thunderous so and I felt so numb and I slowly started walking outside the rain

The rain was pouring down heavily on me but I still continued walking slowly

I guess this is life....the rain pours down heavily on the most innocent and naive people who should have sunshine instead of rain

And by this time...I was crying...what is wrong in wanting to be his Friend

What is so wrong...God tell me...am I not fucking good enough to be his freaking friend

Am i not worth it...am I that worthless and use less...can't i get anything Good in my life

Why am I this stupid and dumb...don't I have all the qualities it takes to be his friend

I don't want anything from him...just to be his fucking friend

I wish I was aborted because their world is too cruel from me to be in

I wish I died as soon as mom gave birth to me

I wish I died in mom's stomach and I freaking wish that I never existed

It hurts so much and it freaking hurts here...in my fucking heart and I don't know why

It hurts so much God...it hurts so much...please take it away from me

Why does it hurt this much...whyyyy

Wait I can escape this hurt by killing myself right...yes that is a good idea

I can escape all this right...I looked around and saw a knife and I quickly took it

Remember your mother...she will not be proud of you if you do this...she will be ashamed to call you her daughter! !

And with trembling hands the knife slowly left ,you hands and fell on the grass

And I fell down and cried my heart out...I cried bitterly and the rain poured down heavily

I cried and cried till I cried no more and I felt nothing...I felt no emotion inside

I...I felt cold inside before I slowly gathered my self and went back k to the house

I went inside and slept >>>

~☆~

I woke up slowly because of the birds continous chippings..I slowly got up and look at the time

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