My Fake Fiancé

Chapter 18 Letting go

"Because what's worse than knowing you want something, besides knowing you can never have it?"
― James Patterson

Julia's prov

  The past few weeks have been torture for me. Trying to mend your broken heart whiles living with the person who broke it is impossible. I stayed later at school so I wouldn't run into him as often. We didn't talk much, I know I was the one to blame for that. If I had never told him, it wouldn't be like this. On the bright side, it did feel like a big weight was lifted off my shoulders. He knew how I felt his reaction wasn't as bad as I had anticipated. But that didn't stop me from crying myself to sleep every night. Asking myself why wasn't I good enough for him, what Claire have I didn't?  The cool breeze blew through my hair causing it to dance with the wind. I took in a deep breath inhaling the sweet smell of nature. I love moments like this, they always feel like a fantasy to me. Just being in a park with the sun present but not directed at you because of the trees. I check the time debating to myself if I should go home or not.

"You look familiar." A stranger said. I raise a confusing eyebrow at him.

"Do you go to this school, probably you saw me a few times?" He shook his head no then a small smile form on his lips.

"I'm actually hurt that you don't remember me I thought I left quite the impression".  He said with a smug smile. My heartbeat quicken when I realize it was Lucas. I try calming myself down reminding myself it wasn't a serious situation. It's not like I did anything wrong we just had a one night stand. Johnny has a lot of those. I knew deep down this one night stand was my lowest point something I regretted and try to erase from my memories. To him, he probably saw it differently. 

"Lucas righ?"  I ask knowing it was him. 

He chuckles then took a seat next to me on the bench. I examine his features with my eyes. He grew more attractive than the first time I met him no wonder he was so cocky. "Yes, it's Lucas I never thought I would ever see you again after that day. I am happy that I did get to see you again." Why did that make my heart flatter?" I thought to myself. 

"It was nice seeing you also Lucas. I have to get home it getting late have a nice day." I started packing my things to leave when he grabs my hand.  I felt butterflies whiles he holds my hand. He started slowly rubbing it.

"I wanna take you on a date tonight." He said whiles continuously rubbing my hand with his thumb. I slowly pull my hand away and made a contact with his crystal blues. 

"Lucas I barely know you and I couldn't go anyway because I have homework to do tonight."

"Come on don't do that. I don't bite, are you scared something more than dinner will happen? I raised my eyebrows in shock and felt myself blushing.  I snicker at him to regain my confidence. 

"Okay dinner that's all." We exchange numbers and decided to meet at the restaurant we were going to.

This felt like deja vu going to Lucas after John rejects me. This is not like that I am accepting John's feelings and nothing besides dinner was going to happen. I haven't gone on a date in a long time I wanted to kinda go all out not for him but for me. I felt like I deserve a night out after weeks of crying. I did my makeup light and wear a black dress that hugs my body. I let my hair out of the bun I had it in and straightened my hair. As I was about to leave John came through the door. Fuck he came home early today. He stares at me with shock.

"Wow, you look beautiful Julia." He said whiles standing there and not removing his eyes off me.

"Thanks, I... um, have a date tonight." It felt so award telling him that after confessing my feelings a couple of weeks ago.

"Oh well that's good." He said painfully. "I actually have something for you." He pulls out a box from his pocket then open it. It was a beautiful necklace that had the initials JJ in a heart. 

"It stands for John and Julia you know I had to put my name first." I giggled.

"Well, Julia could be first since both of the letters are jays stupid." I teased. 

"I doubt that." He walks behind me and put it around my neck. "This will protect you when I can't." He said with a smile. I touch the necklace admiring how beautiful it was. 

"Thanks, John, I will always cherish it." I place my arms around his shoulders and lay on his chest. His muscular arms embrace me resting around my waist. I wanted to stay in his arms forever. Inhaling his cologne, feeling his soft skin against mine .I picture a world where he felt the same way I did. Hoping to hear the words I love you more than a friend coming out of his mouth one day. I pull myself away from the hug before it drives me crazy.

"I should get going." He gave me a simple nod then I made my exit. "I should get going."  He shook his head yes and then I walk past him.