Chapter Thirty Six

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Pierce~

Nate had narrowed down her location to somewhere in Ejido Mesa Redonda, but couldn't get an exact lock on her.

"She's only two hours away. I don't understand why we're still standing here." Pierce growled.

"It's hundreds of acres of dense terrain Hollywood. We gotta get better intel."

"She's doesn't have time for all that!" Pierce roared, slamming his fists down on the table.

Pierce kept his focus down on the table in front of him, huffing with angry breaths and trying to shut down the analytical side of his brain that was rattling off statistics of the decreasing likelihood of finding her before it was too late.

"God only knows what they're doing to her." His head remained down, unable to look anyone in the eyes as his voice cracked.

Declan, Caleb, and Marcus surrounded their broken teammate, unsure what to say, but wanting to show their support through close proximity.

"Let's get some air." Declan said, giving him a squeeze on the shoulder.

Pierce nodded and stood, following his teammate outside where the air wasn't as thick with anxious energy.

He sunk down onto the front steps of Knight with his head in his hands and his elbows resting on his knees.

"I'm coming out of my fucking skin Dec," he admitted to his friend.

"I know. I've been where you are. Which is why you've got to listen to me."

Pierce didn't respond verbally but lifted his head and brought his tortured eyes to meet Declan's.

"You've got to go find that place deep down within your soul that is able to love her and hate them at the same time without destroying yourself. It's a thin line but you have to find it. That's where you need to operate."

"How? How do I do that?"

Declan sighed, searching for the right words.

"Do me a favor... picture Estrada hurting her, the worst way you can imagine." Declan said.

"Seriously?" Pierce was on his feet and fuming at his teammate's suggestion.

"You asked me how and I'm trying to show you, now humor me."

Letting out a skeptical huff of air, Pierce's body dropped back down onto the steps next to Declan, trusting that the horrific task had some sort of purpose.

"Picture Estrada hurting her. The worst thing you can think of...make it real in your mind."

Pierce closed his eyes with his brows drawn in and his lips pressed into a hard line. The images that flooded his mind were gruesome and unbearable, causing his pulse to spike and his breathing to pick up.

"You wanting to tear the world apart to get to her?"

Pierce nodded.

"You wanting to jump in your truck and go rip that fuckers throat out, even if it means going unprepared and putting yourself in danger?"

Pierce nodded again.

"Good. Now...love her enough not to."

Pierce opened his eyes and whipped his head to face Declan, unsure if he heard him correctly.

"Love her enough to fight against your own hatred and wait. Love her enough to make sure you are the best operative you can be when it's time to go save her. You can't save her if you destroy yourself."

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