Chapter Seventeen - Two in a Bed

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Dare I say it, but things have been sort of... weird, between Hendrix and me. Okay, not sort of. They're weird.

Completely and unequivocally my fault, and I don't doubt that for a second. All Thursday and all Friday I completely ignore him. I don't react to his jibes; I pretend not to notice him in the corridors. It even raises some suspicion from Seb and Collins. Of course, Lena knows my reaction is all down to 'eye contact' and she thinks it's utterly hilarious.

Not me though, I've been completely restless, tossing and turning all night as I over think everything. What was it? Yes, eye contact, but there was a hint, an undertone of something else. Usually, when I see Hendrix, I envision nothing more that ramming my foot so far up his arse that is pops out of his mouth. On Wednesday though, there was none of that. No murderous desires, no death glares, no immature comments, just eye contact. And, the more I think about it, there was something else that hung in the air. I dare not to even name it, because I must be so wrong? It's impossible, right?

I'm not often appreciative of my period, but when it makes its grand appearance on Thursday evening, I can't help but click my heels, knowing I've got the perfect reasoning for that weird afternoon. Obviously, mother nature was playing puppet master on my rather fluctuating emotional output. It all makes sense now. There was no moment, none at all.

However, right now, with a cramping stomach, throbbing head, tired eyes, and an onset of nausea, I wish mother nature would cut me some slack. I haven't slept for two nights and what with me having Ellie today, it's far too tempting to just lock her outside so I can have a good nights rest. Who'd have ever though I'd have hung up my dancing shoes and succumbed to motherhood on a Saturday night? More so, I was dead set on being in bed by eight tonight, but Ellie just will not shut up. God, my daughter hates me.

"Please Ellie!" I beg, rocking her in my arms as I hold her dummy against her mouth, despite her still crying against it. "I've done everything. What do you want from me?" I continue to ask with a hoarse voice, changing her position so that I can soothe her back. Hendrix says that's how he gets her to quiet down, but apparently, I don't have daddy's magic touch.

She continues to cry and cry until I'm nearly crying too. I put her in her car seat, pack up her pink satchel, and then knock on Ezra's door.

"I need you to take me to Elijah's."

I'd like to say the car ride is a quiet one, but what with Ellie screaming in the backseat and me sobbing in the passenger, it's anything but. I'm hormonal okay; I'm tired and I cry unnecessarily. I keep turning around, trying to shush her, but of course, she's not real and without contact, she won't be quiet.

"God, if Ferne's baby cries anything like that, I'm shoving it back up there." Ezra grumbles from beside me. I'd laugh, but I'm too absorbed by self-pity to actually emote anything other than tears. We pull up outside and I climb out. "Do you need me to wait?"

I shake my head and tell him that I'll have Hendrix drop me off, so once I've gotten Ellie out, he drives off and leaves me on the pavement. Still sniffling, I knock on the door. When Hendrix answers, slightly blindsided, he raises a brow at my condition. "She won't stop." I stagger out between my crying. Crying, in front of Hendrix. I'll be embarrassed about that later.

He takes the baby from me and ushers me inside, taking us towards his room as I, very unattractively, being sniffing up my snot and wiping my eyes on the sleeves of my jumper. Honestly, I'm such a catch.

When in Hendrix's room, I curl up on his bed and close my eyes, trying desperately to drown out Ellie's crying. "You've tried everything?" Elijah asks me.

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