sparky // a padawan story

chapter 55. voices.

"Padawan Arlo."
I turn around and see Master Yoda hobbling towards me with his cane. "Hello, Master Yoda. Did you need something?"
"If not busy, you are, then speak with you, I must."
"I was just going to speak to Master Obi-Wan, but it's nothing important."
"Good. To the gardens, we go, then." He walks up beside me and we start towards the gardens.
"Is something wrong, Master Yoda? You seem... a bit troubled," I question as we stop just underneath the Force tree.
"Yes, troubled, I am. A question, I have for you."
"Ask away."
"Tell me of the time you spoke to Qui-Gon Jinm, can you?"
"I suppose I can. It was probably a guilt hallucination, though. But the first time, it was very brief. I want to say it was the day after the funeral, though I wasn't entirely sure since they gave me that sedative, and I went to Obi-Wan's quarters. Not to snoop around or anything, but to find... something. Nothing specific. Just some sort of... reason, I guess. If that makes sense." He nods at me to continue. "So I was looking around, and he guided me to a letter and his lightsaber. He didn't have some elaborate speech, just... 'Inside. Take it.' Then before I left, he spoke one more time. 'Be wary of your assumptions, Arlo... it will be revealed... in time.' Then, it was like... I felt him leave. I don't know, it was weird."
"Show up after that, did he?"
"Just one more time, after Obi-Wan came back. I was... hurt, betrayed. I wanted to leave. So he came back, and told me it's okay to question, and to talk to Obi-Wan. But Master Yoda, I really think—"
"Heard a voice, I did, while meditating. The voice of Qui-Gon Jinn, it was. Beginning to believe, I am, that his voice was not your imagination, but rather that a part of the Living Force, he has become."
"Master Yoda, are you suggesting that he... he can retain his identity, even after he's died?"
"I am, yes."
"And you came to talk to a padawan about this?
"Going to talk to the Council, I was, but consult in you first, I wanted to. Open-minded, you are. Curious. Skeptical. Truly a wonderful thing, a young mind is. Your thoughts on this, hm?"
I ponder it for a moment. "...I think that could be a possibility. We have to remember that we all still have much to learn, and maybe retaining identity past death is something we're unaware of, but Qui-Gon was. But, again, I'm just a padawan. I'm not saying that you're wrong about this, but are you completely sure it's not just a memory, like Anakin and Obi-Wan's visions on Mortis?"
"It cannot be. Have no memory of Qui-Gon, you do. Impossible, that would be."
"Then... yes. I think you're right, he could still have a conscience. And I think you should inform the Council of this."
"Surprised to hear you say that, I am."
"I may not trust them completely, but you do. They are wise, and I think it would be wise of you to consult with them."
"Crazy, they may think I am."
"But we're all a little bit crazy, aren't we?"
He chuckles softly as he begins to walk away. "That, we are."
—
"There you are! What, did your Council meeting take a whole day or something?" I say to Obi-Wan as he barges into my room, completely unannounced.
"Actually, it did, Sparky. We quite literally meditated for a day. Master Yoda is in the hospital wing."
My eyes widen. "He's what?"
"Yes. Come on." I follow him out of my quarters and towards the medbay, where we find Masters Windu and Mundi waiting beside Master Yoda's bed, where he lies asleep.
Doctor Nema greets us as we walk in. "Master Kenobi, Arlo. How is your scar?" She lifts my chin gently as she examines it. "It looks as if it's healed nicely."
"It's just fine, thank you," I tell her with a grateful smile.
"I'm glad to hear." She then turns back to her screens on the wall as Obi-Wan and I move to stand by Master Mundi. Doctor Nema speaks up again after a few minutes. "All I can tell you is I have scanned Master Yoda three times and I find nothing wrong with him. I am not an expert on his biology, but from my point of view, he is in perfect health."
"And his mind?" Master Windu questions.
"No signs of any degeneration." She taps on her holopad, on the back of an MRI of Master Yoda's brain. It glows red. "This section of the brain is particularly active, more than I have seen in any other Jedi. Probably what happens when you approach 900 years old."
"I think we are overlooking an obvious threat," Master Mundi interjects.
"Which is...?" Obi-Wan questions.
"Count Dooku was Yoda's apprentice, and Count Dooku has fallen to the dark side—"
"All of us have apprenticed to Master Yoda," Obi-Wan immediately defends. "He cannot be held accountable for Dooku's descent."
"But they are connected... profoundly. Whoever the Sith Lord is, he may be using this relationship as a direct link to Yoda," Master Mundi states.
"Impossible," Obi-Wan argues, beginning to get frustrated.
"Are you so sure?" he questions. "If the Sith Lord wanted to attack the Jedi Order from within, Master Yoda would be the perfect choice. I fear we are more vulnerable than we think."
"Wait, is all this because of the voices he's hearing?" I ask. Obi-Wan, Master Windu, and Master Mundi turn to me abruptly and give me a questioning look.
"He told you?" Master Windu questions.
"He, uh, mentioned it, yeah."
"Why would he talk to you, a padawan, before the Council?" Master Mundi asks with a raised eyebrow.
I mimic his cross-armed stance. "All do respect, but I'm not entirely sure if that concerns you, Master Mundi." I wasn't about to tell them the real reason. They'd think I'm crazy, just like they think of Master Yoda right now.
Master Mundi looks at my master. Obi-Wan just looks back at him and shrugs. He then looks over to me, though, and gives me a look. Not a scolding one for my tone, but a you-do-realize-we're-gonna-talk-about-this one because of my secrecy.
Before Master Mundi can question me again, Doctor Nema speaks up again. "I would like to suggest something: a depriviation ritual. It is a dangerous procedure but one the will without question allow Yoda to go to the source of this voice, whatever, whoever it may be."
Anakin walks into the room as she finishes. "I'm sorry to bother you, but the Chancellor's requesting that Master Yoda attend an emergency meeting."
"I will go," Master Windu says. He begins to walk out the door.
"What about the treatment?" Obi-Wan asks him.
"Ask Master Yoda what he wants to do. Only he can decide now." And with that, Master Windu exits the room.
Obi-Wan pats my shoulder. "Let's go get some air, Arlo, we've been inside all day, haven't we?" I give him a slightly confused look as he tugs on one of my crossed arms gently, prompting me to follow him out of the hospital room and out to the corridors. We walk through the halls and towards the front of the temple and sit at the top of the stairs. I look out to the spot at the bottom of the stairs where I last talked to Ahsoka sadly. She would know whether I should tell the truth about this or not. "So why so secretive?" he asks.
"I mean, everything that Master Yoda does, doesn't have to be everyone else's business. Force forbid he have a conversation with someone else before talking to the Council."
"You're hiding something. Trust me, I know you, Arlo. Now quit fiddling with your shirt, you have nothing to be worried about."
I look down and notice the hem of my tunic in between my fingers. "Oh, kriff this." I stand up and begin to walk back to the temple.
Obi-Wan stands and grabs my arm to get me to stop. "Arlo, what's going on?"
"It's nothing. Really. I'm just worried, is all."
"Like I said, you have—"
"But do I? Do I really have nothing to worry about?"
"Not about this, you don't. Just... tell me when you're ready, okay?"
"I want to tell you, Obi-Wan, I really do, but it's a bad time."
"But it's really not—"
"It really is, though."
He sighs in defeat. "Very well. When you think it's a good time, then, you know I'll be here."
—
Master Yoda is suspended over some sort of bacta chamber. But not a normal one. Obi-Wan, Anakin, Master Plo, Master Mundi, and I stand around it, overseeing the procedure.
"The chamber works to deprive that patient of any stimulation except from within," Doctor Nema says as she walks up to us. "Master Yoda will be taken into an induced meditation. This allows the patient to go deeper than anything we can achieve by ourselves." We all look up at Yoda. That's a first, for sure.
"Master Yoda, you don't have to do this," Obi-Wan tells him.
"He's right, Master Yoda," I add, a slightly worried tone in my voice. If Yoda has to do this because he heard Qui-Gon, then I'd be willing to bet they would make me go in right after if they knew.
Master Yoda looks down at me reassuringly. "Solve this puzzle, I will."
"But it could be more dangerous than you realize," Anakin tells him.
"The danger is not to know the truth. See clearly, I must. Help, this will." Master Yoda puts on the breathing piece as he's lowered into the tank. It shuts and locks.
"Life signs are normal," Doctor Nema tells us as she taps on her holopad. "Beginning the procedure." Bubbles begin to circle around Yoda as he falls asleep in the tank. Obi-Wan takes a nervous step closer to the tank as he observes the old Grand Master.
Anakin bends down and whispers to me. "Hey, are you okay? I can sense you just as on edge as Obi-Wan, though you're much better at hiding it than Obi-Wan."
"I'm fine," I mutter back, keeping my eyes on Master Yoda. "I just... think this is a little too far lengths for these, uh, voices."
"I know. But if Master Yoda thinks it wise, maybe he's doing the right thing. Even though this is extremely dangerous." Suddenly, the bubbles around him begin to spin even more rapidly.
"I, uh, don't think that's supposed to happen..." I state
"His vital signs are dropping too low," Obi-Wan says, panicked.
"But the test—!" Doctor Nema starts.
"I want him out of there now!" Obi-Wan exclaims as he hits his hand on the glass of the tube. "Master Yoda! Master Yoda, wake up!" Anakin walks up next to Obi-Wan and bangs his fist on the glass. Doctor Nema ends the procedure, and Yoda is placed into Obi-Wan's hands and onto the ground. Anakin and I crouch beside them. "Come back to us! Master Yoda, wake up!" After a few moments of Obi-Wan nudging him carefully, Master Yoda jolts awake and coughs up water. Obi-Wan sighs in relief. "Welcome back, old friend. Thought we lost you there."
Master Yoda groans. "Speaking to the dead, I was. Friends, long gone. Good friends." Anakin and Obi-Wan share a concerned look, as if they didn't believe him. But I think, no, I know I do.
—
"How did the procedure go?" Master Windu's hologram asks. Obi-Wan, Anakin, Master Mundi, Doctor Nema, and I stand around it in a meditation room.
"We're not certain," Obi-Wan tells him. "Yoda seems to be under the impression he contacted the dead and spoke with them."
Master Windu scrunches his face in concern. "What are your thoughts on this, Doctor?"
"Medically, Yoda seems fine. But I cannot speak for his spiritual balance," Doctor Nema says.
"What Yoda claims is not possible," Master Mundi states.
"As far as we know," Anakin argues.
"The dead are part of the Cosmic Force and lose their individuality," Master Mundi informs him. "I fear Yoda is under attack by the Sith, though how remains unknown to us."
"Master Mundi, this has nothing to do with the Sith, I guarantee you," I tell him.
Master Windu interjects before an argument breaks out with him there. "Until what's going on is clear, I want temple guards placed in the medical bay." He hangs up the call, hologram disappearing before us.
Master Mundi turns to me. "And how can you be so sure about that, padawan?"
"You said before that you fear our Order is vulnerable, Master Mundi, did you not?" I question. He gives me a confused look, but nods. "Yeah, you're right about that. And this is the exact reason why. Are we really so close-minded as an Order that we believe everything to be a Sith or Separatist scheme? Or to be a scheme at all, in that matter? The galaxy does not revolve around our war. This Order should not revolve around this war. Before the war, we would have actually considered what Yoda is saying to be a possibility. But now, you all just shut it down completely. I believe Master Yoda, and you all should, too. Trust him."
"But that's exactly why we need to be weary. We are in a time of war," Master Mundi explains. "Know your place, Padawan Arlo. You act as if you know what's happening to Master Yoda—"
"That's because I do know what's happening! I've heard those voices before!" My eyes widen as I think to myself. I shouldn't have said that.
"...When?" Obi-Wan asks, almost carefully, as if to not startle me.
I sigh. There's no way I'm getting around this one. "It was after I thought you died. I talked to Qui-Gon. But I thought it was some kind of guilt hallucination or something. Until Yoda told me that he spoke to him too. That's why he talked to me first. He's the only person I told, so I'd believe him when you all didn't." I look at Obi-Wan apologetically. "I would've told you so much sooner if I thought it meant something as big as this. And at the time it happened, I wasn't completely... you know."
"I know," he says softly, as to tell me that it's okay, that he's not mad.
"Now how can we be sure you weren't just hearing things?" Master Mundi interjects. "You were obviously in distress, Master Yoda may be too. It's the perfect time for darkness to strike—"
"I was not struck by darkness, I was pissed because you all let me think the closest thing I have to a good father was dead!" I shout.
"All I'm suggesting is that maybe we let Padawan Arlo do the procedure and see if she can find the voice again, to see if it's real or if her and Master Yoda were just, in fact, hearing things."
"No!" Obi-Wan snaps, losing his calm. "No, no, no. My padawan is not going in that thing. Did you not just see what it did to Master Yoda? No. For the love of the stars, absolutely not."
"Could the Council put it to a vote?" Master Mundi asks.
"You can't possibly be serious!" Obi-Wan argues.
"I agree with Master Obi-Wan. It's a dangerous procedure, and she shouldn't have to do it if she doesn't want," Anakin defends. "Especially because she's sixteen."
"Is it not for the greater good? Master Yoda is doing fine now, he just needs rest. We have to consider—"
"Consider the fact that she doesn't want to do it? Don't you think that maybe this is the reason why she wouldn't say anything in the first place? My padawan is not a lab rat waiting to have some crazy experiment done on her. All due respect, Master Mundi, but you're being irrational, and as long as I have a say in it, you are not bringing Arlo into this. And that's that." He walks out of the room with his arms crossed. I stand there, dumbfounded at his outburst, until Anakin lightly nudges my shoulder to tell me to follow him. I run down the corridors to catch up with him.
"Obi-Wan!" I call. "Wait!"
He stops in his tracks and turns to me. "Yes, Arlo?" I stop in front of him and catch my breath. "Is everything all right?" I nod, and still at a loss for actual words, hug him. He returns the embrace almost immediately, rubbing my back comfortingly.
"Thank you," I say into his shoulder, hardy audible.
I hear him respond, almost just as quietly. "I've got you, Arlo."
—
"Master Yoda, it's good to see you again," I say as Obi-Wan, Master Windu, and I approach him, standing by the Force tree, leaves falling gently in the wind. It's been an anxious few days waiting for his return after he escaped the temple to look for the voice.
"The Council has assembled," Master Windu tells him. "They are eager to hear your report."
"Afraid not much, there is, to say of my journey," Master Yoda says. Obi-Wan and Master Windu share a conflicted look.
Obi-Wan strokes his beard skeptically. "So nothing significant happened to you out there?"
"Yes... and no. To the end, we are coming now."
"Did your journey give you any insight on how to win the war?" Master Windu asks.
"No longer certain that one ever does win a war, I am. For in fighting the battles, the bloodshed, already lost, we have. Yet, open to us, a path remains, that unknown to the Sith, is. Through this path, victory, we may yet find. Not victory in the Clone Wars, but victory... for all time."
—
this is a ki-adi mundi slander account, he's right next to pong krell and luminara unduli on my hit list 😌 also, sorry it's taking forever for me to update lately, i have a bunch of schoolwork and softball season is starting up again, i've been a bit busy but i promise i'm working as often as i can!!
thanks for reading! -a 🪐