Catharsis [Tom Riddle]

Chapter Fifty-Three

 "I want you to make one."

It felt as though the air was sucked right out of her lungs. As if the walls began to cave in on her and the earth stopped spinning.

No, this can't be happening.

She looked at him, her words failing her as he met her eyes with his own. His gaze was nervous, but gentle. Determined, but adoring. The weight of his stare was too much to bear, so she turned her attention to the ground, desperate to escape the reality that met her.

It pained her to hear those words come out of his mouth.

He patiently awaited her response, his hands still holding hers as he stroked her skin. But, after several more moments of shock, all she could mutter out was, "What?"

"I know it sounds scary," he assured, squeezing her hand. "But, I swear to you that I will be there with you every step of the way. We can do this together."

Every word that left his mouth felt like a vise tightening on her heart.

He wanted her to make a Horcrux. He wanted her to become immortal with him. He wanted her to kill for him.

And she had thought that he had changed.

When her eyes met his once more, he was taken aback by the heartbreak in her stare. His worries only grew when he heard the venom in her voice. "Tell me, Tom... how do you make a Horcrux?"

He had expected her to have some resistance to the idea, but he had already played through this conversation a million times in his head. He carefully replied, "The process of splitting one's soul requires a sacrifice in return."

"A life," she said, pulling her hand away from his grasp. "It requires taking a life."

He reached out and put a hand on her cheek, and she hated herself for not moving away from his touch. "I want to spend my life with you, Avalon. And the only way for that to happen is if you protect your soul the same way I have protected mine," he said, stroking her skin softly. "We would be unstoppable. The world would be ours. We could mould it to be what we've always wanted because you and I would be limitless."

"I have told you that I am not interested in immortality, Tom," she said, trying to keep her voice level. A part of her still clung to the hope that perhaps there was a way she could turn this conversation around before it was too late. "Why can't one lifetime be enough?"

"Being with you makes me worry that even an eternity is too short to love you," he said.

Love.

"What?" she breathed out, a pained look on her face.

"I love you."

She felt her heart shatter into a million pieces at those three words. Three words that she had been dying to hear him say. Three words that were being said at entirely the wrong time.

He moved a piece of her hair behind her ear, keeping her gaze when he said, "And that is why I cannot lose you." Slowly, he reached into his book bag and pulled out the one thing that could have made her heart drop more than it already had.

The diary.

He gently placed it in her lap before taking her hand back into his, though her hand felt limp in his grasp. The moment her eyes landed on that leather-bound book, her mind was flooded with a looming sense of dread. It knew she was a threat, and it began to protect itself by targeting her mind. She felt sick to her stomach, desperate to get out of that room, but all she could do was stare at the diary as Tom said, "You've held all the pieces of my heart for quite some time. Now, you're holding all the pieces of my soul, too."