Promise

Chapter 8: Advice

Promise

(Day 10)

 I sat down brushing my tangled hair as I stared at my reflection. I can still hear the sound of the water running in the bathroom as Loanne took a shower. It gave me enough time to call. 

Putting my brush down on the table, I stood up and walked over to where I kept my phone. Picking it up, I slowly turned it on, pressing my contact book I scrolled down to the one name that I needed to call. Closing my eyes, I took a deep breath as my finger hoovered above the name. 

Slowly pressing it, I placed the phone to my ear, my heart beating very fast as I waited to hear that person's voice. 

"Hello, you called my number and unfortunately I couldn't answer it right away so please leave a message and if this is a lady calling in.... give me your number. I will make your day and night the best!" Issac's voice said. I laughed a bit as I can already picture his cocky smile but my smile ended up dying as my eyes filled up with tears as the many memories of him being cocky to me flashed through my mind. I closed my eyes and pressed the redial button. 

I needed to hear his voice again. I could feel my heart break as I kept on redialing his number. Call me crazy for doing this. But you know when you have those days that you just need something that makes you feel nostaglic. To remind you. 

Repeatedly, I pressed it as the tears fell out even more. I tried to hold back the sobs, I didn't want anyone to hear so there I was, clutching my phone while my hand is over my mouth as my eyes are shut tightly. 

~

After my little cry feast, I was standing in front of the window, watching the outside as my thoughts were on him. I felt a hand go over my shoulder, scaring the poo out of me. 

"Sorry for scaring you..." Lily said as she moved over my side. I turned my head andsaw that she was watching outside as well. 

"Are you okay?" Lily asked finally. I looked at her and smiled forcefully. "Yeah... I am why do you ask?" I said

She stared at me for a very long time. All I hoped was that she did not notice anything wrong. "It's just... you seem very distant you know." 

I shook my head. "I am just tired. Never getting good sleeps." I said as i casually or tried to shrug. She slowly nodded her head. 

"Well why don't you go get some sleep then. I will wake you up for dinner... or Loanne will?" She asked me. 

I nodded my head and I watched her walk away into the kitchen. I suddenly felt very bad. I just lied to her. I mean how can I not right? Was it for my very own protection? Of course... But was it also for their very own protection? Maybe it was. 

Closing my eyes, I just decided that I should go up to the room and stay there until it was time for dinner. 

~

I entered the room to find Loanne staring into space. Confused, I slowly walked over to her and lightly shook her while calling out her name. "Loanne?" I said. 

It was like a switch, she jumped in shock and turned around towards me. Her lips turned into an upward motion. "Oh... hey Promise...What's up?" 

I stared at her for a bit before I sat down- well more like plopped down. "Nothing... but whats the matter with you?" I questioned her. She looked at me and shook her head, while her smile was still on her face though I did notice it did drop down a bit. "It's nothing... just drowning in my thoughts..." She wandered off. 

I nodded my head, I understood what she was trying to say. I was also drowning in my thoughts... though Loanne never did go through this before, so it was worrying. "You can tell me about it... It is not good to keep it to yourself..." 

She shook her head and clasped her hand over my freezing hand. "You have your own things to worry about... so when I know that you are worry free. I will tell you okay?" It didn't sound like she was promising me. It was more like she was demanding me. So I nodded my head. 

"Why are you up here? Why not downstairs?" Loanne asked as she turned slightly to look at me. I stared back at her and sighed before I dropped my head. 

"I needed some space.. to think if I should tell them or not.." 

"Tell them that you are close to the end? Or to tell them that you are going to leave..." 

 I smiled forcefully. "Both actually. I know that you told me many times that I should keep that secret out but... I just can't seem to do that." I almost whined to her. 

She looked at me sadly. "I know that it is hard to keep it away. But you have to admit. If you end up telling them, they will probably force you to stay here. And don't lie to me that you were happy living out of this place... you were happy that you had no one lead you. You are happy that you get to choose what you want to do and where you want to go without telling anyone.." Loanne fully ranted out to me though I was glad she wasn't yelling. 

She was right though. I did love being independent, love the feeling that I didn't have to obey anyones rule. Loanne was always right. She was the only person in our group that had sense to what she was saying. "You're right." I said to her. 

She smiled at me softly before nodding her head. "You know.. I hate being right sometimes... it just sucks ass." Loanne said scornfully. I laughed and shook my head. 

"Only you would believe that..." I said. 

~

It was dinner time, and let me tell you. I did not make up my mind yet! I mean come on Promise! It will be an easy decision... right? I hated whenever my brain would argue back with me  like you were suppose to be on my side and work together... not work against me like that was a bit unfair to be honest. 

I felt Loanne's hand go over my shoulder. Looking over, she smiled at me and gave me an encouraging smile. "I know that you are still having a hard time... but you have to choose. It's only time when you will.... be so weak that you won't be able to get up... or even talk." Loanne's voice cracked at the end.

And there it was again. Loanne had another good reason. I was losing time as I say nothing to them... was I being selfish? I don't even know anymore...

What was the right decision?

~

Lily 

I could sense and see something battling inside of Promise... as well as Loanne! It did hurt that I was left out of the circle.

They both knew something and possibly about what was going on with each other, and yet they are not willing to speak to me or Jayden! I mean okay, maybe not Jayden but still I would try my best to help them get a solution to their problem. 

I sighed internally. I knew the only right thing to do was just wait until they decided to speak... and I was hoping that they would do it very soon. I did not want to force it out of them and hurt them in the process. I just can't do that, it was not in my nature. 

Looking over to the girls, I decided to not say anything about their odd behaviour. Instead, I simply watched them to see if I can find any clues... 

And so far? 

Nada! 

This is going to be a long time before I find my clue... and that sucks ass! 

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