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july 5th, 2020
11:12 pm

JOSHUA WAS DRIVING Ayoluwa crazy

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JOSHUA WAS DRIVING Ayoluwa crazy.

He had before but not in this way, not a romantic sense.

Touching her, the almost kissing and the half compliments were all driving her fucking insane.

Did Joshua like her or not?

Ayoluwa couldn't decide.

Ayoluwa laid in the bed on her designated side while Joshua was on his.

The room was dark except for the light coming from Joshua's phone screen.

He was scrolling through TikTok on his phone while Ayoluwa was laying there, solely focused on contemplating his previous actions.

Ayoluwa sat up in the bed and turned on the lamp on the nightstand, gaining his attention.

"I need to ask you something and it's really important." Ayoluwa said after a surge of courage.

Joshua lifted his chocolate eyes to her, "What's wrong, Palmer?"

"If that boat hadn't interrupted us today... Would you have kissed me?"

Joshua's face grew ashen as he sat up as well, "Why are you asking?"

"Why are you not answering?" Ayoluwa countered.

Joshua grew quiet and Ayoluwa began to hum a little bit of Brandy before continuing, "I know we have a weird past and what I'm about to say might make this weirder but I can't act like everything's the same for me. I don't feel the same about you like I did before and if you feel something or... Just anything that isn't hate towards me, I need you to say something."

Joshua coughed, "I mean of course I don't hate you. We're friends now, right?"

"So... Just friends? That's what you want?"

Joshua paused again and Ayoluwa pursed her lips.

She would try again, one final time.

If this didn't work, she would drop it.

"I'm just asking because... I wanna be clear because... Because I think I'm starting to get feelings for you."

Ayoluwa waited for a couple seconds, her breathing halted before looking at Joshua.

His gaze was on the duvet that covered both of their torsos, "What do you want me to say? This is out of the blue for me. I don't know what to say."

"Oh." Ayoluwa replied in a blank tone.

At least she got some clarity.

"I think I've embarrassed myself for one night. Imma see how sticky that couch is."

The sharp sting of rejection was too much for her, she needed to escape his presence.

Ayoluwa started to move out of bed when Joshua gently laced his fingers through hers, "Wait. Wait."

Ayoluwa paused and Joshua sighed, "I'm not gonna lie and say that I feel the same towards you either but... I don't know. I was so fucked up in my head about what you did for so long... And then I was rude for even longer... Trying anything... Feeling like this for you feels weird. Like I'm not being true to myself."

"So being a jerk was you being true to yourself?" Ayoluwa raised a brow as she tried to remove his grip.

"Can you stop and just listen for a minute?" Joshua grabbed her hand again.

"Why? All I'm hearing is that telling you anything was a mistake."

"If you would just listen, you would've heard me say that I like you too!"

Ayoluwa glanced as Joshua continued, "This is all so fucking weird for me."

He rubbed a hand down his face with a groan.

"You don't think that this is weird for me? I don't want to feel this way for you. We have nothing in common except our friends, you've called me every insult in the book at one time or the other but at the same time..." Ayoluwa's tone grew gentler, "I look at you and I feel... All-."

"Butterflies, right? Like bad nerves?" Joshua finished.

Ayoluwa nodded, her gaze on their still conjoined hands.

"Look... It's getting late. How about we continue this in the morning?" Joshua said.

Ayoluwa nodded slowly, turned the light off and then sunk back down into the mattress.

It wasn't a hundred percent what she wanted but for now she would take it.

He liked her too and for now it would be enough.

"And about today... If that boat hadn't scared us, I probably would've kissed you." Joshua said, his back turned towards her.

Ayoluwa slid her hands underneath the side of her skull, then gulped, "What's stopping you right now?"

There was a few seconds of heated silence before she could feel that Joshua was shifting and readjusting in the bed.

Joshua slid his arm over her waist and pressed two fingers to her jawline to ensure that Ayoluwa was looking at him, "Are you sure?"

"If we don't like it, we don't have to talk about it. We could pretend it never happened if that's what you prefer." Ayoluwa replied in a whisper.

Joshua blinked, "I must be going fucking crazy."

Then he simultaneously lifted her chin and leaned down to make contact while she tilted her face up.

The kiss was gentle and a bit tentative as their lips moved slowly, both a little unsure of what they were doing.

Ayoluwa wrapped one arm around his neck to pull him a little closer and Joshua deepened the kiss just a tad.

Her hands slid under the collar of his shirt and Joshua pulled away, "I don't have condoms. You need to chill."

Ayoluwa laughed, "Okay."

Joshua smiled down at her then pecked her lips once, twice and then a third time, "Night, Palmer."

"Good night." Ayoluwa whispered as the room became dark once more and Joshua wrapped his arms around her torso.

NOTE FROM KY
I decided to stop torturing y'all lmao
vote & comment, porfa!

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