Quora/Reddit Forums

Q62: What are good ways of making people nervous without...

...threatening them?

by: Amy Babineaux-Smith

Yes, you can most definitely make someone nervous without any verbal or physical threats.

First, I am not proud of this, but my six-year-old daughter was being bullied by a twelve-year-old girl, and I had to take action.

A friend of mine, while eating lunch with her son at school, noticed something very disturbing: a 6th grader took my daughter's lunch and ate the entire meal while mocking and teasing my girl!

After school, my daughter fearfully confirmed that it had been going on for weeks. I was livid, and "Mama Bear" roared from her den and right into the principal's office.

I was told that there are lunch monitors in the cafeteria who would handle the situation. Anger boiled inside my gut as I left the school completely infuriated.

Those "lunch police" were two elderly women who constantly chatted with each other, obviously oblivious to the lunchroom anarchy. NO WAY was I going to trust them to ensure my daughter got to eat her lunch every day.

I made a plan.

The next day, I slapped on my visitor pass, marched to the parent table in the cafeteria a few minutes before lunch and waited. I wasn't going to say a word. I would make zero gestures and remain as calm as a statue, but I was going to put fear into that 6th grade thief so she would leave my daughter alone!

The students filed in. First graders settled on one side of the table, and shortly after, the 6th graders arrived. Right away I was noticed. The "mean girls" began questioning each other and shrugging their shoulders.

My eyes were fixed on my daughter's bully and my stare was brutal. I didn't blink.

The whole table quickly figured out who I was and everyone looked at the thief. The thief started to squirm. She gave me some hand gestures and mumbled a few swear words. She stood up, she sat down. She stared back, but not for long.

Meanwhile, my daughter softly giggled with her friends and confidently opened her lunch (which was packed with extra goodies). She glanced at me and smiled.

The thief became agitated, and I continued to stare. She yelled at me, and I didn't move. Then, she covered her face with her hands. She put her head down on the table and peeked at me a few times. She wiped away tears. She cried for the remainder of lunch.

Right before the bell, I slowly stood up, gave my daughter a wink and quietly left the school.

I figure my stare felt just like a Mama Bear protecting her cub from a hungry predator. My daughter was never bothered again, and she was able to eat her lunch every day in peace.