Chapter 46

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--WARNING THIS IS THE LAST CHAPTER--

I was standing in the bathroom, looking at myself in the mirror. I still looked the same, but I felt like I shouldn't. I had admitted so much yesterday, not just to Jared, but myself as well.

I gritted my teeth as I pulled my hair back into a bun. It pulled at the stitches in my shoulder but it wasn't as painful as it had been. Some pieces fell from the hair tie but I didn't care enough to sweep them back again.

I looked down at the gun and dagger still sitting on the counter. Jared hadn't moved them yesterday. I picked up the dagger holding it in my palm for a moment. I looked at the shiny blade and was invaded by memories. All the times I'd plunged my dagger into those hearts, sides, or slicing straight through those necks.

My hands were coated in layers of blood and there was nothing I could do to wash it off.

The dagger clattered into the sink as I gasped. My heart was racing and the panic closed in on me.

"Electra, are you okay?" Jared was at the door. The worry in his voice was clear, I didn't even have to look to see it on his face.

"I'm...I'm fine. Um, do you think you can take that back to Trevor?" I asked not looking up at him. He slowly made his way to the sink, picking up the dagger. He was looking at me questioningly. How was I supposed to tell him that I couldn't touch it? That even holding the dagger was too much for me to bear.

"Can you please just take it to him? I don't want it." I placed my hands on the sink, watching him from the mirror as he nodded, not taking his eyes off mine until he turned to leave.

I looked down at the gun sitting a few inches from my hand. I was afraid to even attempt to pick it up. I was afraid that I'd have the same problem with the gun that I had with the dagger, but the thought of being unarmed scared me as much if not more so than the thought of those memories invading. I knew that we would meet more werewolves and other creatures along the way, and while I accepted the fact that not all supernaturals were evil, there were still some out there who wouldn't hesitate to hurt me; especially if and when they learned what I was, or what I'd been.

I picked up the gun and wasted no time putting it in the waistband of my jeans. I just wanted it out of my hands for the time being.

I went back into the room and looked through the rest of the clothes my sister had gotten me. At the bottom of the bag I pull out something familiar, a black leather jacket. It was a new one. I held it up and looked it over. I shoved it back into the bag and tied the handles so none of the contents would spill out. I just couldn't wear the jacket at the moment.

The door creaked open and I looked back to see Jared coming into the room.

"Are you ready to go?" He asked.

"Just about. Do we have the transportation worked out?"

"It just arrived. I gave Trevor money to go to a dealership. He brought us back a Hyundai."

"A Hyundai?" I was a little skeptical about the car but we were running on short notice and we couldn't really be choosy.

"Yeah. Apparently he got a few strange looks when he handed over the money in cash."

"I can only imagine." I shook my head slightly. As if we weren't already on a list of people to look out for, we just send someone out to dump a few thousand dollars on a car-in cash.

I grabbed my stuff and went out to the living room. Josh was looking all sulky on the other side, away from everyone else. Alex was standing near Trevor. I'd noticed they'd been near each other since shooting practice in the basement. I wasn't sure if there was something going on there, but if there were, they would be good for each other. I wasn't sure Jared believed the same though.

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