HIRAETH // Captain Puffy X Reader

12

You couldn't get the map out of your head. 

It was hours later now, and you had settled in your hammock for the night, swaying back and forth with the gentle movement of the ship. In the next hammock over, Tubbo was curled around his little bee, sound asleep. A few spots away, Gemma lay in the moonlight, hat over her face as she slept. 

It seemed like you were the only one awake on the whole ship. 

You shifted in your hammock, careful not to move too much lest you accidentally fall out again, trying to get more comfortable and get off to sleep. Your mind was too busy whirring though - everything you knew about that map passing over your thoughts incessantly. 

If you had been given the opportunity you had today two weeks ago, you would have grabbed that map without hesitation and jumped off the ship.

Instead, you had just hesitated in the door until Puffy had locked you out.

What was going on with you?

You weren't one of these people, and you had even been on the mission to go and retrieve the map for the king. Anyone else that you had been working with would have taken the map without hesitation. If it had been Simon in your place, he would have died trying to get that map away from the pirates and back to the king. 

You hadn't even made a grab for it. 

You kept telling yourself it was because Tubbo had also been in the room - it just wouldn't do to have Tubbo see you and his mother got at each other's throats, not when he was clearly fond of you and well - Puffy was his mother. And Gemma had been there as well - there was no way you would have been able to beat both Puffy and her and get the map. And you didn't want Puffy to hate you more than she already did-

Feeble excuses. You knew why you had hesitated - and it wasn't exactly a new realization, much to your chagrin. 

These people weren't exactly what you had been expecting when you had first been briefed about the crew of the Night Ghost. You knew them as one of the most fearsome groups of pirates in the world - they thought of themselves as above the law, and wouldn't let anything get in the way of them and their goal - whether it be treasure or something else.

You hadn't been expecting them to be like a family. 

You hadn't expected the infamous Captain Puffy to have a son. You hadn't expected her crew to work like a well oiled machine - everyone was respectful to each other, and they all followed Puffy's orders without question. She treated them like a family, even though they were just manning her ship. You hadn't expected her first mate to be a gentle giant of a woman - and even though she had completely kicked your ass in the battle, you still found yourself laughing at her dry sense of humor. 

Just watching Puffy with her crew was something else - she was easily better than half of the captains in the navy. There was no sense of superiority, and she listened to what he crew had to say. She was adept at the helm of her ship, and used the boat like an extension of herself. You might not have liked her that much, but you couldn't deny that she was a great captain. 

You didn't want to like these people - they were criminals - but you couldn't help it, after spending almost two weeks helping around their ship now. 

It felt like you were betraying the memory of your own crew. What would Simon say if he knew you had all but betrayed the crown just from being stuck in prison for a week? Granted... you hadn't really done anything to betray betray the crown, but you should have grabbed that map to at least try and make a run for it...

You rolled over in your hammock again, suddenly feeling a little queasy. What would your crew say if they came to rescue you... only to find you had been helping the very same pirates you had sworn to bring to justice? Because whether you considered it or not, that's what you had been doing - menial tasks like organizing supplies, yes, but helping nonetheless. 

One word echoed around your skull - traitor. 

Traitor to the crown, traitor to your captain, traitor to your crew, traitor to the memory of the Blue Knave-

You jammed your eyes shut and slowed your breathing, trying to force yourself to sleep. It didn't work though - your mind was too awake now, and you couldn't stop thinking about the oath you had taken when you had joined the king's military. You'd sworn to protect the crown, it's lands, and it's treasury with your life. 

Yet here you were, alive and in the belly of a ship you had been chasing across the sea in the name of the king. 

You were regretting ever taking Puffy's offer to come out of the hold. If you were still sleeping on the floor, at least you would have the peace of mind that you weren't betraying your crew. 

In the hammock next to you, Tubbo shifted, stretching his little arms out before blindly searching for his bee again. You couldn't help but reach over and push the stuffed animal into his hands, smiling when he gripped tight around it and drifted back to total sleep, breathing evening out again. 

Maybe all of it wasn't so bad. If you hadn't been pulled from the sea, you would have never met Tubbo. You didn't understand how such a sweet little boy could have grown up in a place like this, but here he was. You ran a hand through his curls, brushing over the little horns near hsi forehead before drawing your hand back and finally drifting to sleep.