Avernus || Book 1 ✔️

||Messenger||

I rose my fist to rub the sleep from my eyes as I slowly walked down the stairs. I was woken by light chatter and the clinks of mama's fine china; two things that meant we had a guest over.

It was late, later than I would usually get up at least. I felt my cheeks warm as I recalled the reason why.

Luckily I was able to sneak back home in the nick of time; I remembered seeing the soft pink hues of the sun herself just before my eyes closed for the last time that night.

As I rounded the corner in my crème nightgown, my fist dropped down to my side as I saw Elder Amis and mama chatting away at the table.

Immediately my heart stuttered in my chest and my skin paled; her presence had woken me right up.

What was she doing here? Had she told mama about what I was up to the night before? If she did I was in big trouble.

I bit my lip nervously and paused in the doorway of the kitchen where I was quickly spotted.

My nails pressed into the palms of my hand as I waited for the anger and words of disappointment. Although I pushed mama's buttons often, she was never really upset. I could already feel my eyes watering in suspense.

"Primrose, you look pale. What's the matter?"

I released a shuddering breath as mama walked up to me and cupped my face in her hands, a concerned look marring her face.

My eyes flickered over to Elder Amis who sipped her tea and quietly watched the exchange.

"N-nothing," I stammered. "Elder Amis is here." I observed, still a bit thrown off by my secret keeper.

Mama dropped her hands to my shoulders and gave them a gentle rub.

"Oh, yes. She just wanted to come and check in on you. She's been visiting all the girls that went to the ball to make sure they've been faring well." Her green eyes softened and she looked at me as if I lived through a war. "I can't imagine how overwhelming that experience must've been."

I gave a small smile but I was sure it presented as more of a grimace.

Thankfully, mama backed away from my shaky form and grabbed a woven basket that seemed to be filled with freshly washed laundry.

"Well, I'll leave you two to talk. I'll be right outside if you need anything."

I stayed in place, frozen, as I watched her leave through the back door to hang the clothes to dry.

My eyes found their way back to Elder Amis, who merely gestured towards the empty seat at the table.

I scurried over and plopped myself down on the wooden stool, my mouth already opening to ask her my most burning question.

"I didn't tell her dear."

Immediately, my shoulders sagged in relief.

"Oh, thank the gods! When I saw you here , I-I was so worried. I thought that she was cross with me—"

Elder Amis placed her warm hand on top of my own, silencing my nervous ramble. Her eyes presented soft as always, but there was a certain pitied gaze that sent an unnerved shiver down my spine.

"Primrose," she sighed, "I was contacted by King Xander this morning. He knows about your...pairing."

My lips parted in shock and my skin burned cold like ice as if I'd been tossed into a frozen lake.

"What?" I whispered.

I barely registered the comforting squeeze she offered to my limp hand.

"His son informed him that you two are intended mates. He said he knows that it was kept secret after the ball but he's happy Prince Ronan found you regardless."

"Prince Ronan" I whispered; although my words were so quiet it sounded more like a jumbled breath.

Why did Prince Ronan tell the King we were intended? He is not mine and I am not his.

Did Azrael know about this?

"The King thought it only appropriate for you all to meet over lunch in 3 days time."

Elder Amis hesitated, and said her next words slowly. "He also invited your mother."

Although she spoke softly and held such empathy in her tone, the words still sliced into me with an intensity that left me winded and gasping for air.

"Breathe Primrose, it's going to be all right."

I hiccuped and struggled to catch my breath as the situation dawned on me. No, it was not going to be all right.

Prince Ronan is not my mate; why would he tell his father that? Was I to be mated off to this man with no say of my own?

Surely, Azrael wouldn't allow this, he would not be okay with this—Yet, it was happening anyway.

Had something happened to him? Oh by the gods, I hope nothing had happened to him.

The thought only made more tears stream down my face, the Elder's touch and soft murmurs my only source of comfort.

She probably thought I was in such a state because mama will discover my secret. And while this scares me, it was nothing compared to the skin crawling ick I felt at the possibility of being ripped from my soul. 

I needed to see him, I needed to talk to Azrael about this, there must be some kind of explanation.

But there's no way I can visit Avernus tonight. Mama won't let me out of her sight once she hears of this.

I would have to wait 3 days before seeing Azrael again.

My heart felt twisted and coiled like the branches of an aged hazel tree. This pain was foreign and deep and seemed unrelenting.

The Elder was nice and familial but she was not helping soothe this ache inside me.

I wanted Azrael, my mate, my soul. 

My heart cried out to him.