Swallow Your Affection

Is this a Wall

When the two of you left your cabin, you were in a haze.

Hatred was burning in you, but the feeling of not caring was burning even stronger.

You had nothing to say.

Manberg could go fuck themselves for thinking they had the right to go to your house and leave a letter on your bed saying it was 'funding.'

Did they honestly think that was appropriate behavior?

Why can't they be civilized, and kind- compassionate- anything other then assholes.

You couldn't let yourself stop ruminating on that fact, stewing on it for a very sizable portion of the walk back home.

About halfway through the walk back to the ravine was when you decided to speak.

"Why are people assholes."

The mix between anger and unfeeling tone coming off harsher then intended.

"Why do people think it's okay to go to someone who doesn't want to get caught up in drama- and wreck their shit."

Techno grunted, "And that is why me and people don't mix."

Sighing, you relented, shrugging off as much of your anger as you could, pulling your thoughts straight as you opted to think of the positives.

You weren't living in the cabin anymore- so it didn't matter.

You were living with a revolution, with people like Tommy and Techno- who had your back.

To an extent.

Gods- what if you hadn't made an alliance with them.

What if you never met them, and when you did it was on the opposite side of the sword.

You'd be the sad sack you always were, a loner who lived in the woods, visited every eight years by a friend who actually knows what they want to do in life.

You felt eyes on you, and knew Techno could read your facial expression.

You refused to look at him.

"Do you ever feel like maybe everyone and everything just sucks- even yourself."

Techno looked at you, frown apparent on his lips.

He wasn't comfortable. Be it the discussion, or with the fact that it was you trying to have this discussion, it looked like he didn't want to think about those types of things.

"Do you ever wonder what it'd be like without everyone?" You asked, glancing down to look at your pocket watch. You thumbed the gold on it to try and sooth yourself.

Technoblade was so- difficult to pull into this type of conversation. He was standing at the top of a metaphorical fence, staring down and refusing to jump.

But after enough waiting, he seemed to give, one foot lifting and hovering over the edge.

A scrap of what lay beneath his face peeked at you, a peice of him he let go of with so much kicking and screaming you weren't sure if it was right to take.

"Are you scared of me?" Was the simple question, "Is that why you're talking to me. Is this the whole reason you're prying into my thought process?"

You looked at him in stunned silence. A reply coming out of your mouth as soon as you saw his fist clenching.

"No. You're intimidating to me, yes, but I never questioned the fact that you were a person. Did I make you feel like less of a person by asking those questions? Because if I did I'm sorry-"