phobia (sequel to insomnia) | stray kids ff

zone 30: sacrifices

a/n:
i find it very cute when u guys complain about me not updating but although i love yall... i gotta wait to post so i wont be stressed and feel rushed to write a new chapter. so bear with me thank youuuu

Wonpil's POV

Hana sticks her hand out of the window as I drive the yellow truck Jinyoung let us go out with. I eye her as she closes her eyes and feels the wind blow through her fingertips.

"So which pharmacy do you want to go to? I know that there is still stuff at the one a few miles from here," I say and Hana smiles a little while keeping her eyes closed.

"I don't actually need pads," she laughs softly. "I just said that so I could get out for a while."

"Oh," I say, shocked that Hana lied to Jinyoung. "Why did you want to get out?"

"I just needed some air..." she says. "Too many things have been on my mind."

"Things like?" I try to meddle. Hana sighs and opens her eyes.

"Promise to keep a secret?" She asks. I nod and Hana lets out a deep breath. "You can't tell anyone else," Hana says and I nod my head again.

"You have my word," I promise. Hana stays silent, probably deciding if she should trust me which I understand since it seems like this has been on her mind for a while and she hasn't told anyone.

"I still love Hyunjin." Hana confesses.

Hana's POV
I feel my heart break once I say it. My eyes start watering and I look out the window so Wonpil does not see. 

"That's not a secret," Wonpil says and I close my eyes, hoping I didn't seem like a fool for saying that even though it is very obvious. 

"Is it that obvious?"  I question and turn to look at Wonpil.

"Not to him, but to almost everyone else who knows you two, it is," Wonpil explains. "I see the way you look at him and I see the way he looks at you." Even though I want to believe that Hyunjin still has feelings, I can't because I know there is someone else there.

"But he has Wonyoung," I say in a low voice, feeling a little sad. "I shouldn't feel jealous but I do," I reveal. Wonpil stays quiet for a while to give me some time to think.

I think back to SM Town and how Hyunjin acted whenever I was with Jaehyun and when I told him we kissed. I feel my heart sink realizing how much Hyunjin must've hurt seeing us and imagining us kissing. It's the same feeling I get when I think of him and Wonyoung.

"Maybe I deserve to feel this way," I let out and then look out the window again.

"No, no way in hell," Wonpil rejects my thought. "Hana," Wonpil tries to speak for me but I stop him.

"I kissed Jaehyun," I interrupt to defend my opinion. "I kissed him and then Hyunjin came to see if I was really alive at SM Town and was jealous of Jaehyun and I," I explain. "This pain I feel, is the pain he felt." Wonpil grows quiet again and sighs. "I deserve this."

"It doesn't mean you deserve heart break, Hana," Wonpil says in a soft tone. "He thought you were dead and found Wonyoung just like how you thought he was dead and you kissed Jaehyun. Sometimes, life takes you into new directions," Wonpil says, making me think about what Hyunjin and I are now.

"So... should I move on?" I mutter to myself, feeling my heart grow weak.

Jeongin's POV

"Going out without Jinyoung knowing doesn't sound like a good idea at all," I whisper to Felix who ignores me as he packs his backpack with weapons. The sun was slowly starting to rise and no one was awake.