58. greer

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The sun leaked through the small window in the room Bellamy and I had been given to stay in. Morning had crept upon Sanctum, bringing with it a new day. 

I should have felt relieved, felt safe, knowing that we were allowed to remain in this seemingly safe haven, but I couldn't shake the dark thoughts from my mind. 

Octavia was out there- most likely all alone. I feared that she was no longer alive, knowing that was worst case scenario. 

Bellamy had awoken not long after I had, the two of us tangled together in bed, but neither saying a single word for the better part of an hour. 

"What are you thinking about?" I finally asked, the sun now higher and brighter in the sky, causing me to turn my back to the window. 

Bellamy shifted, allowing me to lay my head against his bare chest. I let out a low sigh as I listened to the slow rhythm of his heartbeat. 

His hand pushed the hair from my face as he stared ahead, his eyes distracted. "Same thing as you."

I looked up at him. "How do you know what I'm thinking about?" I challenged quietly. 

He cracked the smallest of smiles. "Because I know you better than anyone."

I exhaled, laying my head back on his chest as he ran his finger up and down my back absentmindedly. 

"Did I do the wrong thing? Should I have let her come back?"  Bellamy wondered, his voice cracking slightly- either the result of these being some of the first words he had spoken this morning, or because of the emotions he was feeling. 

I was silent for a moment as I thought about his question. I didn't know what my answer was. 

While I wholeheartedly agreed that Octavia wasn't the girl she used to be. She was ruthless, violent, and lost...but she was still Octavia, right? I wasn't entirely sure I could answer that question either. 

I thought about what I would have done in this situation. All those years ago, when Finn had gone rogue, I hadn't been able to look past the fact that he was my brother. I almost ignored the fact that he was a murderer, too caught up with the boy he used to be. 

But now here we were, all of us were murderers in some form or another. So what made some of us more moral than others? The motivation behind our killings? The guilt?

After a few moments of thinking, I replied to Bellamy. My voice was low, proving the uncertainty in my answer. "No." 

Bellamy stilled for a moment, and beneath my head I could hear his heartbeat slow slightly, he was relieved by my answer. 

"You made the right decision for the group. As hard as it is to accept, Octavia might have jeopardized our future here. " I assured. "I know how hard it was for you, but I know why you did it, Bell. "

Bellamy seemed to hear the words I said, but didn't fully digest them. "She's my sister." he whispered. "And I left her to die."

I quickly shifted, flipping so I was looking up at him. His hand fell from my back as I reached up, cupping his face in my hands. "Don't." I ordered sternly. "Don't think like that."

His eyes were soft as he stared back at me, trying to think of another way to incriminate himself. 

"Stop it, Bellamy." I demanded.

He let out a small sigh. "You don't even know what I'm going to say."

A smile spread across my face as I nodded. "Yes, I do. I know you better than anyone."

𝐒𝐀𝐋𝐕𝐀𝐓𝐈𝐎𝐍─𝐛𝐞𝐥𝐥𝐚𝐦𝐲 𝐛𝐥𝐚𝐤𝐞²Where stories live. Discover now