Snap Happy (A Daniel Ricciardo story)

28. One Of Us

Note: The following chapter is centred around an event that considering I've based my story around the real reults of 2014, I couldn't really leave out. There will be no description of the crash itself, or speculation about the cause, or Jules' injuries/condition, it is a chapter solely based on how I imagine my characters might think, feel, and react under the circumstances, some of which is based on my own feelings immediately after Suzuka. I know the F1 fan community, not just the inner circle continue to keep Jules and Michael in their thoughts. If it takes a miracle to bring them back to us in any form, then that is what we will hope for, however bleak it may seem, particularly in Michael's case. Let's hope 2015 is safer for all our motorsport boys (and girls) wherever they are. E x 

Edit: 18/7/2015 this chapter was published many months before Jules slipped away. Rather than changing or deleting it, this story is from now on dedicated to his memory

EM

I had considered ringing Dan the moment I stepped onto Japanese soil, my heart racing at the thought, but decided against it. It was for both our sakes I told myself.  He had more than enough to focus on over the course of the grand prix weekend without the added complication of..well...me.

The weather wasn't helping the situation either. Warnings were starting to come in of an approaching typhoon with rumours circulating that the race itself might be in jeopardy. There was no sign of that today however as I shouldered my kit and headed down to the garages, a little sore still, a little tired, but otherwise none the worse for my unscheduled hospital stay.

I had happily taken the McLaren team up on their offer, the invitation to spend practice with them eagerly confirmed as soon as I had touched down. I was under strict instructions from Darren not to overdo it this weekend, and what better way to ease gently into the usual routine than by chilling out in the McLaren garage for a couple of hours. I was only following orders I justified. It was a damn good excuse anyway and I couldn't wait to see everybody. I'd only missed one race but somehow it felt like I'd been away for far too long. I needed to feel the petrol flowing through my veins once more. 

 "Jenson!" I grinned as I entered the garage, and held out my hand to the tall Brit who had looked up from the car and was currently making a beeline towards me. 

"Enough of that" he brushed my hand aside and moved to pull me into a hug. I held my breath, not wanting to reject the friendly gesture but anticipating pain. None came, instead I was clasped warmly but gently, and released with a smile.

"It's good to see you"

"You too" delight was something I knew I'd never have to fake with Jenson, or the rest of the team for that matter. Despite their stern, unsmiling figurehead, the team on the front line had been nothing but excessively welcoming from the very start. 

"Have you met Kevin?" Jenson motioned to the young Dane on the other side of the garage. Younger than me I realised with a start. So many of them were these days - I wasn't watching older men putting their lives at risk anymore - I could have been watching my cousin, or my little brother. I WAS watching the man who had been my lover. 

"Briefly" I answered in response, and waved to the blonde driver who raised his hand cheerily in return.

Jenson leaned in for a final word in my ear. 

"I bet Dan's glad to have you back - he wouldn't say much but last time I saw him he was wandering round the paddock like a zombie"

I smiled weakly at him as he put his helmet on and climbed into the car. I wasn't so sure it was my state of health that had the Red Bull driver so worked up, but the information only reaffirmed my decision not to approach Dan until after the race.  Whether what I had to say to him would make things better or worse I couldn't guess, but one thing was for sure - it was best said once the main business of the weekend was completed safely.