Light of Mine (RusAme)

Chapter 50

Ame's P.O.V

"Did you know something was going on with them?" I screamed.

"No! What would give you that idea? America, if I knew something was up before, wouldn't I have called you and told you?"

"What if you're already on their side? What then? You wouldn't have told me then!" I growled.

There was silence for a moment, too long of a moment.

"Ha, so you admit it."

"What- No! I never knew about her hitting Massachusetts or any of the others."

"Canada, do you really think it's a stretch if she's blown up an entire building, sacrificed two of her members, and was willing to risk Mexico dying for good, does it really come as a surprise to know that she's been abusive?" I pointed out.

Canada was nearly speechless on the other side of the line.

I was currently in the bathroom and I was trying my best to be quiet, but I was failing miserably.

My anger clouded my mind, so that it was the only thing that I could recognise. My arms and hands twitched, as I awaited a response from the person on the other side of the line.

Clearly, I was taking my anger out on my poor brother, but I didn't really care at that point. Sure, going outside helped a little, but it only masked my true feelings that I felt; betrayal, destress, and rage.

"I swear I had no idea!" Canada frantically spat out. "I would have done something to stop it if I knew what was going on. I wouldn't just let them get beat up by that brute, especially without her receiving any consequences for her actions."

"You need to trust me on this one, America." Canada pleaded. "You know the type of person I am. I would do anything for those kids. I wouldn't touch a piece of hair on those kids' heads with ill intent. Please...you got to believe me."

"I-I..."

I didn't have the guts to face him after that, nor the words to express what I felt like.

I was sorry, that was for sure, but I was also something else.

It was as if there was this bubble in my chest that hasn't popped yet. It was quite uncomfortable and I wanted it gone. It felt like a spiked ball that was poking my ribs and threatening my lungs.

"America, I can't really place myself in your shoes or see through your eyes, but I know that you must be feeling a lot of doubt, because of all of them. That's gotta be hard on you and your head. I mean, I can't imagine you not being affected by this. You are calling your brother a liar when we've been through so much together." Canada told me in one of the most sincere voices that I've ever heard come from.

"I'm just, I guess I, listen I know-" I tried to say what I was feeling then, but the right words could never connect themselves.

Canada was silent, while I struggled to say something to him, "I, uh, um...I'm sorry." I finally managed to sputter out, then I hung up.

I closed my eyes and pressed my back against the bathroom wall, as I slowly slid down the smooth, chilling surface. There seemed to be more than a million thoughts trapped within my mind, but I couldn't express a single one of them.

What's the point of words when you couldn't use any of them?

After lingering on the wall for more than what would be considered a normal amount of time, I regained my foothing and stood up.