Chapter 19.1

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The sun was low in the sky and night would soon be upon her but she was driven by her purpose. Gus had sent Luke on an errand out of the city. He would be away for a few days but he had told her to sleep in his room if she wanted to. She had nodded but entering his room when he was not there felt more intimate than when she was pressed against his chest.

Duke trotted beside her as she reached down to collect stones and rocks. After a fitful rest she was able to climb back on Duke's saddle. He was kinder, not galloping off without warning this time. A part of her believed he was testing her, to see if she would return after his assault.

She gripped the stones she had collected to her chest. She found a pretty pink stone by a river, a dark grey one near the apple trees, and two smooth oval stones laying together on the forest floor. Duke huffed and kicked at a rectangular stone near his feet. She looked down it had spirals on it—almost in the shape of a lily.

"Good find, Duke." She said and patted his neck.

She found a tall pine and cleared the forest floor at its base. Meticulously she began placing the rocks into four piles, placing her chosen stones on the top. The pink stone for Jane, the dark grey for Ryder, the rectangular one for Lily, and the two identical smooth ovals for her parents.

Stepping away she looked down at the piles.

She turned to the pink stone. "Jane, beautiful Jane. You were the stronger one, a flame extinguished too soon. I always acted as if you never understood me, but it was I who failed to understand you and I regret my foolishness everyday. Rest easy, dear sister."

Next she looked at the rectangular stone. "Lily, you were my first mount and no other horse will ever compare to you. Thank you girl, for always being loyal, until the very last moment."

She turned to the two stones.

"I am so sorry." She began, tears pooling in her eyes. "I am so sorry for ever saying I wanted more than the life you gave me. I was blessed beyond measure to have been raised by such strong and kind people. I wish everyday I could tell you how much I love you."

The tears fell. Looking at the dark grey stone, her voice broke as she spoke. "Ryder, you were the bright light in my life. When others would have expected me to become a docile wife, you cherished my wildness. You never tried to control me and I was a fool to not realize this sooner. I will forever be in your debt."

A fresh stream of tears fell and her chest shook as he drew in a breath. "Ryder, I need your permission." She gulped, "I need your permission to open my heart to someone else. I have met someone and I don't want to be alone in this journey."

She knelt down, looking at the graves through her tears. "I will never go a day without wanting to know what happened that day. Why The Guild came to our home? But I don't want to hurt anymore."

She hung her head. Duke nudged her and she raised her hand to rest on his head. Her tears were flowing freely now but it was the closure she needed. Her family would rest while she continued her search in Ilaburn.

Casting one final look at the stones, she turned to Duke. "Let's go back."

She guided him in a gentle trot back to the castle. Many sentinels looked at her as she rode in on Duke. The stable master watched with his mouth open. And when he tried to take the reins from her, Duke huffed and bucked against his hold.

"Let me," she offered and guided Duke into his stall. She worked silently in the stables, removing the saddle and brushing him down before getting him some water and food. Once she was done it was night and the stars shone above her.

"How did you tame him?" The stable master asked. He was an older man, grey hair covering his head.

"Duke is special. Don't get rid of him."

The man nodded and she left, returning to her chambers. There was a note on the floor in front of her. Crouching down she unfolded the note.

I'm back. I'll come find you tomorrow. Have a good night.—Luke

She smiled and tucked the note into her pocket. Donning her night gown she retired to her bed. She groaned as her sore body sank into the soft bed and without second thought, she was lulled into a dreamless slumber. 

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