🌟She's Special🌟

Recollection

The Trinity School (West 91st Street) (12:45 PM) (Thursday, April 8th) (Bella's Perspective)
"Bella?" It was like the world froze. Mommy pulled me to the side and my eyes began to water. I can't believe that someone touched me again. It's like bad things always have to happen to me.
"Bella, what's wrong?"
"Someone touched my private. Mommy, you said it wouldn't happen again! If you can't even stop it no one can! I'm just a person for people to hurt."

"Bella Danielle Benson?!" I stopped doodling and realized that Hannah had been nudging me for the last minute.
"S-sorry, Ms.Durand. Can you repeat the question please?" My history teacher sighed and wrote on a piece of pink paper. Oh no, I have to report to my health teacher now. I felt so embarrassed, my classmates were asking me if I was okay. I haven't zoned out like that in....ever!
"Bella, go visit Mrs.Walsh. I'm notifying her that you're coming." My adoption day is on Saturday and usually, around this time I tend to get flashbacks about my time with Olivia. They're usually very good, but lately, I just keep remembering my assault on Halloween when I was 9.
"Feel better Bella, you look so out of it." Jake said to me. My other classmates said the same. I'm glad that my classmates are kind, but this is so embarrassing. I hope Mom doesn't have to hear about this.
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Mrs. Walsh's Office (Trinity Upper School Building) (12:50 PM)
I hope I don't miss lunch over this. I'll just tell her that this was one big fat misunderstanding and that I'm fine! Completely fine! I knocked on the door and I was told to come in. Honestly, I don't even want to stay here that long, lunch is in 10 minutes.
"Good Afternoon, Mrs.Walsh."
"Good Afternoon, come sit down and have a drink of cucumber water." She poured me a cup and I drank some silently.
"Ms. Durand called me because you've been spacing out a lot in her class this past week. Am I wrong?"
"No, ma'am. I haven't been the most attentive." I said honestly.
"Some of your other teachers have said the same, and that you were even tearing up at one point." I nodded.
"Is something going on that I need to notify your Mother and Father about?"
"No, not at all. I'm fine really." I said while lying through my teeth. I've lied about my feelings dozens of times before, I could do it again.
"Does this have something to do with Jake Romano?" Huh?! What?! What does she know about me and Jake Romano??
"No, why do you say that?"
"You guys have been getting rather close lately, I thought it'd be fair to ask. I have eyes Bella and I know when two teenagers like each other."
"Oh, okay." I calmed down.
"Well, if it doesn't have anything to do with Jake, what's going on sweetheart?"
"Nothing, I'm fine. May I go to lunch please?"
"You know, you're a very tough person to crack emotion-wise. I'll let you go to lunch, but if you get referred to me again you will be staying here until I get an appropriate answer young lady."
"Yes, Mrs. Walsh! Thank you!"
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The 16th Precinct (Midtown, Manhattan) (1:15 PM) (Olivia's Perspective)
I'd just gotten back inside from questioning the friend of a victim and I was exhausted. I haven't been home in two days, and haven't seen my kids or husband in that time either. As I dug into my lunch my phone rang.
"Who's this?" I picked it up and answered.
"Good Afternoon, this is Olivia Benson."
"Good Afternoon, Ms.Benson this is Mrs.Walsh from the Trinity School." Oh, Bella...what've you done?
"I have some things to discuss with you concerning Bella. Do you have a moment?"
"Yes, I do. Is she okay?"
"I can't tell. Since the school psychiatrist is out, I as the health teacher has been filling in. Bella has been zoning out and crying a lot this week in class. I questioned her about it and she insisted that nothing was wrong. I don't think she's being truthful, however." I thought we promised she'd be more open, why didn't she at least come to me and talk about it?
"Bella is like that yes, she isn't always honest about her feelings and I've been talking to her about that for years. She's made some improvement, but I guess there's been a setback. I'm sorry about this."
"Oh, no worries Ms.Benson. Thank you for informing me."
"I'll talk to her about it after school, you have my word for it. Also, there's something I've been meaning to ask you concerning your health class. Can I communicate that with you?"
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The Dancer's Den (4:35 PM) (The Upper East Side) (Leia's Perspective)
"Mommy, I haven't seen you in a while! I missed you!"
"I missed you too, Leia boo!" Mommy helped me change into my regular clothes and I told her all about my day.
"Leia, do you know where Bella is?"
"She's talking to Hannah and Paisley upstairs. Want me to get her?"
"No, it's okay darling. Stay right here, play with Mama's phone." Maybe Bella's in trouble! I sneaked around to the other side to hear.
"I think you should tell your Mom." I heard Paisley say.
"It isn't good for your anxiety to keep that in."
"I don't want to tell her, it's dumb."
"Bella, you being assaulted on Halloween isn't dumb. Why are you speaking about it like that? It's traumatizing and you need to talk to someone who can help you." Hannah said.
"Girls, what's going on?" Mommy's up there!
"Nothing Mom, we were just-"
"No, it wasn't nothing! Ms.Benson, for the past couple of days Bella's been having flashbacks to when she was assaulted on Halloween and she needs help."
"Bella?!" Oh no, Bella is sad! Oh no, no this isn't good!
"I don't want to do this right now." I heard her say. I couldn't do it anymore. I ran upstairs.
"Bella, don't cry!" I hugged her.
"Leia, how about we go to the vending machine and get some candy?" Paisley asked.
"No, I want to help my sister!"
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Mom's Bedroom (Home) (6:57 PM) (Bella's Perspective)
Mom came into the bedroom and stood as I cried. She didn't say anything.
"Mom please, please don't do this right now." Instead of trying to pry info from me she kissed me and left the room. She's following the agreement we made. Honestly, she's making me feel really sucky right now. She's trying to make me feel bad because I didn't hold up my end of the deal, and on top of that my friends are all pushing me to talk when I don't want to. I don't want Mom to call off my party on Saturday though, I guess I'll just do it.
Sapphire: I know that you hate talking about your assaults, but trust me, if you're honest and upfront about it it'll help in the long run.

I didn't want my friends to know this side of me, I would've rather kept this private. I'm just glad that the boys don't know the specifics. All they know is that I'm not feeling myself.
"Hey sweet pea, are you ready?" I nodded. She sat down and rubbed my back.
"Hey, I'm not mad. I promise." She hugged me.
"I'm really sorry Mom, I just keep ruining everything. Every time we try to make our relationship better I could never be consistent and-"
"Shhhh, you're okay. It's okay." I didn't know I needed to hear that.
"I haven't been home lately, and we haven't been journaling. It's okay. I'm not angry with you."
"Mrs. Walsh called me today, your teachers are concerned. What's been going on during class."
"I can't focus because I just keep thinking about that Halloween. I didn't tell you some things at the time."
"Like what, sweetie? Does it pertain to the case?"
"No, just to my personal feelings."
"That's fine, I'm not holding it against you. You were 9 1/2 years old and you were so confused and scared. You can tell me, it's okay."
"At the time I felt like I was just a person for people to hurt. Like I had some target on my back. I was molested and beat up!" Mom hugged me and told me to get that out of my head.
"Bella Benson, you do not have a target on your back. You didn't deserve nor ask for that violation of your body. It's their fault, not yours, you were a small girl and it should've never happened. But guess what?"
"What?"
"You can better protect your body now, right?  You can confidently speak up when something isn't right, and as long as you use those abilities no one will see you that way."
"I think you're right, Mom. Ever since I learned about boundaries and self-protection, I haven't been hurt like that. Mommy, thank you so much!" We shared one of our most sacred hugs. This reminded of why Olivia adopted me. She adopted me because she loves and cares for me, and she wants to protect me as much as she could! I'm so grateful to have her as my mother and I'm so happy that she chose me!
"I'm sorry that I didn't tell you at the time. I just didn't know how to explain it and I was scared as well."
"You don't have to be sorry, I'm proud of you for opening up to me. How about we go get some ice cream?" I smiled.
"That sounds good, we need to get our share before Noah and Morgan eat it all!"