Loving The Russian Mafia

Chapter 49: Not a saint

Vienna's POV

"Ryan. It's enough now, please stop pacing around. There's a shattered glass all over the floor, you'll hurt yourself" I said yet again, concerned that he might hurt himself as my eyes followed him from left to right as he paced around the kitchen, paying no heed to my words.

"Okay fine continue walking around but at least let me clear this off" I added talking about the glass pieces scattered all across the kitchen floor.

"No. Don't. The kitchen help will do it" He replied, grabbing my arm, stopping me as I was already looking for something to clean off the glass pieces.

"Finally. I thought you turned mute" I said shaking my head.

"Let's talk somewhere else" I added a moment later, worried that he might start pacing around once again and hurt himself in the process, if we continued this conversation here.

"Ryan. I don't think you should be this worried baby. I mean yeah things would have taken an entirely different turn if they managed to abduct me...and honestly, when you told me that they were not your guys, I was scared too but it's okay now, they failed to abduct me. I'm right here...safe and perfectly alright...and most importantly...with you. You don't have anything to worry about baby" I said, trying to convince him to stop worrying and thinking about the 'what ifs' as we sat on the couch in the living area.

What has happened has happened but because of that I don't want him to worry so much and destroy his own peace of mind.

He looked so happy just a few minutes ago...so happy and in such a good and playful mood...he had such a beautiful smile on his lips that erupted a strange warm feeling inside me...that relaxed me and somehow made me feel that there was finally some peace in our lives and it somehow took me back to our college days when we had nothing to worry about...when we were so carefree, but I think I destroyed it with my own hands by telling him about what happened.

But at the same time I had no idea that things would turn out like this...that the guys who tried to abduct me would turn out to be someone else and not his guys.

"It's my fault. We were so happy just a few minutes ago...I just shouldn't have told you anything" I said in a low voice almost as if talking to myself.

"Are you crazy Vienna" He mumbled.

"Don't even think that...there's nothing to hide between us, love" He said, taking my hand in his.

"I'm glad you told me" He added placing a soft kiss on my knuckles.

"Though I'm just worried and you cannot just ask me not to worry...someone tried to fucking kidnap you and I couldn't do anything about it, it's not a small thing that I shouldn't be worried about" He said as I just sighed before resting my head on his shoulder, not knowing what else to say.

"What if they succeeded in kidnapping you..." He paused exhaling a sharp breath.

"Just thinking about it makes me see red...it enrages me...but moreover it scares me...I have never been scared in my entire life but when it comes to you, I do feel scared...I feel terrified that someday, someone might hurt you...that someday, someone might snatch you away from me..." He paused yet again as I just listened to him quietly.

"I might look rough and tough from outside...I might look like a fearless man but deep down inside me...I'm always scared of losing you...losing you is my worst fear and if my worst fear really comes true someday...then I won't be able to live" He continued as a tear slipped down my eye at his words.

"I just can't live without you" He added as I tightened my grip around his arm.

"I love you so much...and I'm not going anywhere..." I paused entwining our fingers.