Eden and Bea (LGBT+)

🌳 x 19

"You do have friends, Eden," I argued. 

She released a short laugh in response to that. 

"Ha. Barely," she said, "I have a few here and there but, honestly, how many people just want me for my money? How many people want me just because I'm beautiful?" she asked me and then frowned a little, as she realised what she had just said. 

"There's always going to be people who want something for their own personal gain," I said, "Unfortunately, that's just the way the world is. It doesn't mean that there aren't good people out there, though, Eden. And as someone who has tried to get to know you over the years, I can hardly comment on the over-emotional or over-sensitive thing- seeing that you're actually human is great," I said. I really hoped that she would take it as a joke. 

She smiled. 

"It's not only that," she went on to say, "You think I have it all together- I really don't. In fact, I fulfil almost all of the blonde stereotypes there are. Look at the way that I've treated people like Ren. Look at the way I've treated people like you," she added. 

I exhaled slowly, as she gazed right at me again. 

"I cry all the time. I'm always unorganised. I spill frappes on buses and I forget half of my belongings the night before a camping trip," she said, "I'm not perfect in any way, shape or form, but I am trying." 

I could tell that she really did mean everything she just said. 

"I'm glad that Ren doesn't pick sides. She's actually such a sweetheart. I mean, yes, she's weird, but she's one of the only girls in this school that I trust," she said and then met my gaze with a more serious expression, "Besides you, of course," she said. 

I felt my expression become incredulous, then. 

"You trust me?" I asked her. I sounded about as dumbfounded as I imagined I looked. 

Eden's hazel eyes brightened with some humour. 

"I trust you," she confirmed. "I know no matter how my day goes, I can always count on you to be there. I know we hardly talked before all of this, but I regret that. Sort of. I don't know. I can't help but feel like I'm just rambling here," she said. 

"No, ramble away," I replied. 

She chuckled at that comment. 

"Thanks," she said. "I've been far too careless," she continued to say, "I never thought about how much what I did would affect other people and now it's driven so many people away. I have only myself to blame for that." 

I gave a shake of my head in response to that. I wasn't sure whether arguing with Eden was the most practical thing to do, given past experience, but I knew that I needed to be real with her where most people hadn't been. 

"No. You don't," I said, "And I should know that. I pushed you away." 

"Don't say that, Beatrice. I deliberately tried to hurt you because I didn't like you. You tried to be my friend until you couldn't take it anymore and I understand that. I get it," she said, "I've been an absolute bitch and I did it because I wanted to. I wanted to make you feel bad. I knew that if I couldn't get your attention any other way, after you became friends with Axel, then I was going to do it that way." Her voice became a little bitter, as she said her last sentence. "You annoyed me, more than anything else, because you seemed to have it easy, where I did not." 

After she said that last part, her expression became disgruntled again. I could tell that there was a lot on her mind, but I knew that she probably wouldn't want to talk about it. 

"Eden, why didn't you like me? I just want to try to understand," I said. 

She shook her head then, as her lips formed a line. 

"I can't tell you that, Beatrice," she replied. 

"Can't or won't?" I replied. 

She sighed. 

"What's the difference?" she asked me. "Honestly?". 

"You trust me, don't you?" I asked her. 

Something flickered in her gaze then- agreement, I considered, but it didn't last too long. 

"That's besides the point, here," she replied. "I think I'm going to take a walk," she continued. 

She stood up but I reached out to grab her forearm, this time. 

"Walking away from your problems isn't going to solve anything," I said simply. 

"Stop trying to be so down-to-earth and calm about everything. Look me in the eyes and tell me that you don't hate me," she said then and I noticed that her eyes were shining again, a reflection of her irritation and anger? No, frustration, I decided. Those weren't angry tears. Her voice sounded like that of a disappointed person, rather than an angry one. 

I felt my heart beat a little unsteadily inside of my chest, but I knew that I had to tell her what she had asked me to. The truth. 

"I don't hate you," I said, as I locked eyes with her again. "I never have." 

I realised then that I honestly didn't think myself capable of hating anyone, not even her. 

Regardless, Eden looked entirely unconvinced by my statement. 

She released a dry laugh and when she spoke again, her voice became even more bitter. Her eyes darkened. 

"Now you're just lying to yourself," she said and then turned and walked right out of the tent. 

I felt tempted to go after her, but I could tell she needed this time alone. 

So, I waited a short while until I knew she would be a distance from the tent, and then left to go to the women's bathroom so that I could brush my teeth and shower. I let the hot water wash over me and it was an effective method of distraction for its duration, but as soon as I had returned to the tent, clean and dry, I couldn't help but feel all of the anxieties return to my mind again.