Getting to Nirvana {editing}

Chapter 20

(Caution this chapter contains sensitive subject matter)

On life's journey faith is nourishment,
Virtuous deeds are a shelter,
Wisdom is the light by day and right mindfulness is the protection by night.
If a man lives a pure life nothing can destroy him;
If he has conquered greed nothing can limit his freedom.

~Buddha

Chapter 20

Zephyr

A whole carton of cookie and cream ice cream. Check. A bag of snickers and butterfingers. Check. Chocolate chip cookie dough and sour patched kids. Check. A pack of Twix and sour straws. Check. And a quart of iced tea. Check and done. I smile widely as I survey the groceries I'm about to devour. My cravings for sweet and sugary drinks and foods has increased in only the past couple of days, probably due to the baby.

I'm not proud of myself but I've gained five pounds in the past week alone. Guess it's all a part of being pregnant.

I've already been at Heart's for a week already. Since then I've gone to all my classes and gotten the best grades I can, I've been daily tormented by my evil roommate Sarah and I've called and texted my friends and parents daily. It might not be the best school or the best situation but I'm still making it, the best I can.

Now it's Saturday, and on weekends they let us go out, so while everyone else at Heart's is probably going out with their friends or boyfriends, I'm currently in the process of gaining even more weight.

When I wheel my cart of groceries to the checkout aisle, I see the guy that helped me out in the parking lot manning one of the grocery aisles. This is bad. Really bad. I hide my face and slowly back away...straight into a display of ritz crackers. They fall to the floor loudly and everyone turns their heads to look in the direction of the noise. All their eyes fall on me including parking lot guy.

"Oh my gosh! I'm so sorry! I'll clean it up!" I say while I hurriedly pick up the ritz boxes and put them back on the display case. Parking lot boy scowls at me and then talks into a speaker next to him. "Clean up on Aisle 3."

Towards the back of the store I hear someone groan and yell. "Aww come on!"

My face hits up like the sparks on a stove as I stand them looking clueless.

"Well are you going to come check out your groceries? Or do you prefer to stand their while your ice cream melts?"

I cringe at his condescending tone, and roll my cart towards his direction my head bowed. He then starts checking out my groceries. He must think I'm some kind of fat ass with all this junk food. Which I am but he doesn't need to know that. "This is for a sleepover with my friends." I say quickly.

He gives me a quizzical look. "Did I ask?"

"You know I could get you in trouble with your manager for your behavior. I'm sure he wouldn't take it too kindly that one of his workers is being rude to a customer." I respond sassily.

He looks surprised at my outburst but I've surprised myself even more.

"Sorry ma'm." He mutters with a scowl, putting emphasis on the m'am part.

When he hands me my change I look up and finally notice his black eye. It's faded somewhat but it's still very noticeable. I'm so distracted by it I drop my change, and dimes and pennies roll along the floor, but I disregard it. "Did they do that to you for helping me?" I ask with a gasp, now feeling guilty for threatening to get him in trouble with his boss.

"Does is matter?" He frowns.

"Yes because I'm the reason why you got hurt! I am so sorry!"

He hushes me. "Can you keep your voice down you're being really loud."