Never In A Million Years

Chapter Thirty

Brendan's already gone when I get out to the parking lot. He's nowhere to be seen. I don't know where he could have possibly gone, because his car is still three blocks away, out of gas.

My tears flow freely now. I stop on the curb just outside the school, sitting down. I put my face in my hands, willing myself to believe that it's a dream. No, only ten minutes ago we were happy as can be.

What just happened?

A constricted noise comes from my throat when I picture his face in my mind. The hurt look. He might never trust me again.

It's probably best that I start walking home. Before it's too late. It takes a moment for me to bring myself to stand. I take off my mask and drop it onto the sidewalk. Then I pull off my shoes and throw them across the parking lot as hard as I can, screaming. My entire body pumps with unused adrenaline, anger, and sadness.

I start walking towards the way I know to be home. My cheeks are wet, my eyes red. My head aches. My mind is foggy. My feet hurt. I feel dazed.

"I trusted you."

I stop, folding forward, hands over my ears, elbows on my knees, letting out a sob.

There's no way I can let Brendan go. I can't. Not after I realize how much I actually care about him. I feel the reality of everything hit me.

And Caleb. Who I thought was going to start making things better. We were going to make up. Be friends again. And then he does something like this.

One name comes to mind.

It's the only thing that makes sense.

Shelby.

Her threats to me. That I should leave Brendan alone. Caleb's strange actions earlier at my house. She was using him as a pawn in her evil schemes. And he did it. I can't believe this.

I have nobody left for me.

If Brendan never talks to me again, Caleb betrayed me, and the school hates me, I'll have a heck of the rest of the senior year.

Maybe I should try calling him. Even now, I know it's a stupid idea. I can't help myself. I dial his number.

"Hey, this is Brendan, leave me a message and I'll get back to you."

It didn't even ring. He rejected my phone call.

Then again, what was I expecting to happen? Him to answer and tell me how sorry he is? No. I put my phone away and start walking again.

My eyes are so blurry with tears that I can't see which direction I'm going in. I just keep moving. At this rate, I'll never get home.

"I guess I misunderstood you."

The cold air around me chills my arms to the point of me thinking they'll be amputated come morning. Only an hour earlier, I had Brendan's jacket over my shoulders.

Where could he have gone?

Did he really run away?

No, he probably stopped somewhere to calm down.

Maybe I should do that too, because right now I'm going to wander into the road accidentally because of my lack of vision.

I stop where I am and try to wipe away my tears. As soon as I do, new ones replace them.

"I don't want to hear it."

He won't hear my side of the story. And if he did, would he ever believe me? He seems set on thinking I cheated on him.