Upon the Gaze (Ghostface X Reader 18+)

CHAPTER 29 - The Not Deer

Pack the box. Pull one out. Light the end. Inhale. Exhale. I fidgeted with my lighter in my hand. Cigarette hanging from my lips. Smoke drew slowly from my nostrils.
What should I do? How am I supposed to feel? What is the right choice in this situation?
Options are limited for me now. After Danny and I's interaction, we layed on the couch for a while. When the clock struck 10 pm, Danny got up from the couch and made his way upstairs. I felt the anxiety rise within me. I rose up, but remained seated on the couch. Eventually he came back down those stairs. He was dressed as Ghostface once more. He was adjusting his gloves, paying me no mind as he made his way over to the door. He paused as he stepped just in front of it. It seemed he felt my gaze upon him just as he always does. He turned his masked face to my direction, and in a low voice said, "stay put, sweetheart. I'll be back later." With that, he was out the door.
Presently I sit on the back steps of the door connected to the kitchen, leading out into the back woods. I stared out between the dark tree limbs as though they had eyes to stare back. Nothing is really the right answer. No matter how many options I try to conceive in my mind, the outcome is always an uneasy one. If I were to leave Danny, I wouldn't exactly be safe on my own either. After murdering my own father, I could easily be a wanted woman. And even if they somehow weren't onto me, there's still a chance of one day being found out. Plus I can't deny the feelings I've developed for my killer. He's drawn feelings out me in ways similar to water miraculously being drawn out of an old, seemingly dried well. Feelings I haven't felt in a long time. Feelings that for once seem to be genuine. Of course, one would be conflicted in this situation. Not many people get to have a life story of almost being killed by a man in their own home, falling in love with them, and then living together in a secret romantic partnership.
I shook my head, trying to empty the thoughts from my mind. I drew the smoke from my cigarette, deepening the draw into my lungs. I leaned into my palm as I exhaled, and stared blankly into the darkness, not particularly looking at anything. After a few more minutes I decided I had had enough of the mosquitos and chilly air. I put out the bud on the steps, grabbed my pack and got up, dusting myself off as I did so. As I turned to go back inside, with my hand on the doorknob, I heard a twig snap from behind me. I froze for a moment, but in my quick thoughts came to wonder if it was Danny trying to sneak up on me again. I eased a bit, and began to turn my head in the direction of the sound. "Danny-" I began, but stopped just as quickly. A deer was behind me. Staring at me. It looked black due to the darkness of the night, but I could still easily make out it's figure. For whatever reason that feeling of foreboding and dread reentered me. It's eyes seemed to glow like that of a predator's. Could this be the same deer I saw not too long ago from the window of the kitchen? It brought a deep uneasiness to me. For some reason I asked myself in my head, "what does it want?" As if simple woodland animals would have an agenda. It didn't move though. It was still, but didn't seem frightened at all. I was scared, but I couldn't pin point why. We were both frozen, staring back at one another. The uneasiness grew and grew. I could feel my heart pounding in my chest. I still had my hand on the doorknob and could feel my grasp tightening from the tension of the situation. My gaze didn't leave those glowing eyes though. They couldn't. I couldn't figure out what it was, but there was something wrong with this deer. Other than it being quite large with a massive rack of antlers and these odd, seemingly glowing eyes, it was just a deer. Right? The longer I stared though, it felt as if the animal was gaining on me, even though it hadn't lifted it's legs once. It felt like the forest was closing in all around me, and this animal was cornering me in a dark place. The wind carried a sound, almost like a mechanical one in the air. My heart was pounding, grip tightening, fear rising, and suddenly I was able to break the trance. I opened the door as fast as I could, rushing in, slamming it behind me and locking it. As I did so, I could have sworn I heard something that sounded like an elevator pinging, to indicate the stop at a floor. But that's absurd, obviously. I heaved breath in and out of my chest and tried to calm down, leaning into the door a bit as the fear quelled. Slowly I pulled back the curtain covering the back doors window. I saw nothing. I felt befuddled now looking almost frantically around the backyard, but...nothing. Had I imagined it? I suppose the shadows of the forest could have played tricks on me, easily. The antlers of a deer could have just been tree branches. But...what about those eyes? I tried to reason with myself. If there had been a deer, I likely scared it away when I slammed the door shut. I sighed as I combed one of my hands through my hair. I'm being ridiculous I thought. I relaxed a bit finally, and began making my way towards the stairs. I took one glance back at the door, over my shoulder, as I left the kitchen.
"Fucking deers..." I said under my breathe.

The next day Danny still wasn't home. I tried knocking on his door and even peeked in, but only slightly. I wouldn't dare have done that if I thought he was home, remembering the last time I had entered his room without permission. Though it had been exciting, it also scared me. His mood can swing so easily, like a pendulum swinging back and forth from sweet to intimidating. I sat alone in the kitchen, with another cigarette lit. I kept glancing at the backdoor to the kitchen. I aggressively put out my cigarette and grunted, feeling annoyed with myself for being paranoid over a deer. But at the same time I couldn't help but feel like there was something more to that strange interaction. I rose up from my seat and went back to my room to get ready for work.

"A big, weird looking deer?" Shayna asked me. I nodded and explained to her how it seemed off but I couldn't put my finger on why. I sat in the one chair behind the library counter, across from her as she sat on the counter itself. It was a slow day, so we could get away with doing stuff like that, and if we heard someone walking in, she would immediately jump back down and retain a semi professional behavior again. Or at least as professional as one would have to be working at a library. Which is basically just be polite and don't piss anybody off. Jarret was late, but we were starting to wonder if he just wasn't coming in today. It wasn't too big of a deal, bit still a tad annoying for him to not at least call out.
"Maybe it was a Not Deer!" Shayna said, suddenly seeming excited. Her face lit up as soon as the thought came to her.
"A...Not Deer? What is that exactly?" I asked her. "There's an old folklore of creatures that people refer to as Not Deers in this area. They're described as deers that have something wrong with them. Like backwards legs, strange, twisted antlers, even crazy things like human faces!"
My eyes widened at the explanation.
"Well, what does it mean?" I asked her.
"Maybe it's some kind of omen!?" Shayna eccentrically suggested. I slumped slightly in my chair. "Are you trying to make me paranoid or something?" I questioned her, feeling partially annoyed now.
"I'm just saying," she said as she shifted in her spot on the counter with her hands raised in a somewhat loose, defensive manner. She was quiet for a moment, then said "Has anything happened recently?" I tensed at that question. I felt nervous wondering what would drive her to ask. "No, why?" I responded, mentally cursing myself as I felt I spoke too quickly, potentially giving myself away.
"Just curious," she said, "everyone's been pretty on edge lately. If you haven't been sleeping well because of everything going on and have been stressed, maybe you did just think you saw a weird deer." I sighed softly, realizing she did just mean it with concern. "Well, I think everyone's been a little stressed out. I'd like to think I'm not just going crazy from it though." I told her.
"Maybe take a day or two off?" She suggested. "Nah. I've already missed enough days." I responded as I moved from the chair to the pile of books. The conversation seemed to end after that, but my mind carried on the thought.
A Not Deer? What kind of weird folklore does this town have? But...what if I did see some kind of strange creature in the woods? I stalled my thoughts with aggravation. No, no. Sure, dating a serial killer is strange and sounds like something straight out of a made up story, like a dark, serial killer romance novel, but it's still in the realm of possibilities. Mystical deer creatures, giving me omens in my backyard though? Noway. No...way...right?