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psst
hey
hey
guess what
hey
hey
hey
hey
wait ur streaming rn
fuck u
hey
hey
hey

What
I am streaming right now
What do you need

hi :)
im bored n lonely
heyyy
dont leave me on read stupid

[INCOMING CALL FROM Ranboo]

"hi coraline."

"hi smelly. hi chat."

"why am i the smelly one? this is illegal."

"ok but you stink. i had to keep spraying perfume last night after i left your place because you stink so bad."

"you literally said you would never wash my hoodie because it smells like me."

"shut the fuck up. what are you up to?"

"mining."

"mineeee diamondsss... mine diamonds...."

"please don't."

"i'll mine them..."

"coraline—"

"so far i've got TWO—"

"oh my- thank god shes muted now."

"coraline?"

"hello?"

"sorry. mom doesn't like my version of the hit 2016 classic mine diamonds by minecraft awesome parodies."

"i would assume not. its 9 pm."

"its noon somewhere."

"what"

"wine o'clock."

"please don't drink wine on my stream."

"—lame."

"thats your yawn? your yawn is so cute."

"shut up i am going to key your car."

"no- no please—"

"say goodbye to your toyota camry."

"i dont even drive a camry."

"would you rather me name your exact car or say the most common car in america."

"..."

"fuckin' thought so."

"anyways. when do i become the next member of the dream smp?"

"no—"

"do i need to make a tiktok listing the reasons why i would be a good fit?"

"coraline dream is in my chat right now—"

"good. reason number one: i will break up ranboo and tubbo's marriage."

"you wouldn't"

"try me. reason number two—"

"please—"

"i am actually an actress."

"okay yeah no thats actually a good point"

"number three—"

"speaking of which did you guys know that coraline played the lead female in the musical? she was really good. im talking moved everyone to tears. she has single handedly made catch me if you can my favorite musical."

"shut up. number three"

"you're out of reasons aren't you."

"number three: please."

"oh dream said something in chat. hold on what did he say..."

"wait he did? fuck shit fuck wait oh fuck wait shit wait i—"

"start streaming and he'll think about it."

"ok pog."

"wait fucking what"

"thats what he said!"

"wait holy shit"

"hold on wait coraline what kind of computer do you have?"

"an old ass dell laptop."

"hmm.. okay. check your texts."

"what?"

"oh my"

"holy fuck?"

"holy shit."

"i'm going to pass out."

"wait no dont."

"you just sent me 2,000 dollars how am i not going to pass out."

"believe it or not, crying and passing out actually isnt a common way people react to things."

"you've spent 3,000 dollars on me, not including all the games you bought me."

"and?"

"you're fucking insane."

"i'm not insane. i just care for my friends"

"three days into talking you literally sent me 1,000 dollars. you're insane."

"blah blah whatever. 2,000 should be enough to get a simple set up."

"bro i dont even have a fucking desk"

"ikea trip tomorrow."

"ok yea but im paying for my own desk."

"we'll see."

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