Lilac's Lies

1

I've been to this party before.

I mean, I haven't. Clearly I haven't, but at the same time... I have.

I've been to this party so many times I could go home now, and still know everything that took place. I could tell you what songs were played. I could tell you who hooked up with who. I could tell you that the alcohol tasted like a watered down version of what it was supposed to taste like. I could tell you that the air smelled like sweat. It mixed with the scent of pheromones coming from the dancing teenagers, all of whom were drunk out of their minds. It clung to the air, sneaking into your nostrils. Making you either want to join them in their sloppy grinding in the middle of the cleared out living room, or vomit.

I should go home. I wish I was at home. I wish I was anywhere but here.

But, I can't be anywhere but here. I need to be here, because if I'm not here then I'll be asked why I'm not here. If I'm asked why I'm not here then I would have to lie, because if I were to be honest they would ask more questions. So in attempt to keep myself out of the never ending circle of questions, I'm here.

"Lilly! Take this." The slurring sounds of my best friends voice brings the sound of the thumping music back. It had been quiet in mind, just for a second. The loud, rhythmic vibrations had all but vanished, replaced by only a quiet humming. My best friend Clara stood in front of me, holding one shot glass in each of her hands.

I took it without question. I was already drunk, but one more couldn't hurt. Who knows? Maybe it will even help. I ran my eyes over Clara as she downed the other shot. Her blonde hair was dishevelled. The sandy coloured strands were gathered into a messy pony tail, the base of which was tangled into one gigantic knot. Almost as if it had been clumped in someone's fist.

And... judging from the rest of her appearance, I'd be willing to bet that's exactly what happened. The right side of her white tube top was pulled down, her nude bra on display. Her black eye makeup had found itself on the skin beneath her eyes. I guess whatever she was choking on had made her eyes water.

My best friend of thirteen years. The honour role, class president with more extracurricular activities than the Ivy League colleges will know what to do with.

One of those extracurricular activities was being... promiscuous.

Not in a bad way. I loved it for her. She didn't care about boys, she only cared about how those boys made her feel. On her terms, when she wanted it and how she wanted it. I couldn't blame her. I've never judged her for it. Though I've never been able to follow her lead, I've always ended up falling in love before I knew it. Not for the last two months, however. Another one of the many consequences for our bad behaviour. Another one of the many consequences for the never ending list of secrets, of lies. They're one and the same here. I can't tell where the lies end and the secrets begin.

And our secrets... our secrets were enough to ruin all of our lives. Our secrets were a one way ticket to jail, if anyone ever uncovered the truth... and we all knew it.

"Take it!" Clara squealed out, too drunk to meaningfully notice the way I had zoned out. She pushed the shot glass towards my mouth, grabbing my jaw with her other hand and pulling it open. She pushed the shot glass over, the brown liquid falling onto my tastebuds and making them squeal with displeasure. Whisky. Who the fuck even likes whisky?

"You know that I hate whisky." I coughed out, almost choking on my own saliva in disgust. I yanked my head away from Clara's hands, walking briskly to the kitchen in search of anything to get the putrid taste of whisky out of my mouth. I didn't care to see who each person was as I elbowed them out of my way. I grabbed an open can of coke off the counter, not worrying who's it was as I drank from it quickly.