Loving the Fighter

93

Jax's POV

I dreaded going to my session all day. I didn't want to talk about how I was doing, I didn't want to hear Andrew nag on about nightmare meds, and I didn't want him to tell me the test results.

I just didn't want to be anywhere near him today.

"You doing okay?" Liam asked from his side of the conjoined bed. We were finishing up our new book for English, Liam was reading it to me like always, but he seemed to be able to tell that I wasn't listening after a while.

"Andrew will tell me the test results today," I say numbly, making Liam frown.

"I'm sure it will be okay. If it comes back positive for what ever Andrew thinks it is, he will already have a treatment plan set up for you. And if it's negative then he'll move onto the next thing."

"I'm not sure which I prefer," I say as I watch the minutes tick down on the clock. Ryder would walk in before long. I would have to leave soon after him or Andrew would come looking for me.

"I don't know what to say," Liam said after a few minutes, his socially awkward nature shining through his fake confidence.

"Do you want us to come with you," Callum spoke up for the first time in a while. He was lying on his bed, his elbow slung over his eyes to keep the light out. I thought he had been asleep this whole time but he must have just been listening to Liam read.

"I don't know."

"Just say the word and we'll go," Liam said as he closed the book.

"I think I want you to come," I say after a while. "But I don't know."

I wanted them to come. I didn't want to have to sit there by myself while Andrew told me that I was more insane than we originally thought. But at the same time I didn't want Andrew to tell them that I was more insane than they originally thought.

"Think about what you need then," Callum said as he sat up and uncovered his face. "Do you think you can get through the session without slipping if we aren't there?"

In all honesty, I didn't think I could leave the cabin right now without having an anxiety attack.

"No."

"Are you okay with us knowing the test results?"

"I think so."

"Then I think you have your answer. So do I need to go put on shoes or are we staying here?"

"Go put on your shoes," I grumbled as I flopped back onto the bed.

Both Callum and Liam did so wordlessly before joining me back on the bed as we waited for Ryder.

My heart began to race the second Ryder walked in the cabin; a small frown covered his face as he looked over to me.

"It's your turn," he said sadly.

"Fine," I say with a dramatic sigh as I stood up. "But you're coming with me." I force a smirk to cover my face as I stalked over to Ryder, who looked overly confused. "I don't want to get my results alone," I whispered to him, a frown covering his face as well as he nodded.

"It's gonna be great," he said as he changed his face quickly to a smile as he walked back to the door.

"I hope so," I say mostly to myself as I followed his lead with Callum and Liam close behind me.

Andrew didn't seem all that surprised when I walked in with three extra people.

Instead if the usual chair in front of his desk he motions us to a couch pushed up against the wall before moving his chair away from the desk and in front of us. Callum sat on the left, Liam on the right, and Ryder stayed perched on my lap. I couldn't tell which of the four of us were the most tense.