The Group Chat (Marauders AU)

94

best black👯‍♀️

hoe
where tf are you?

"detention"

why the quotes?

because it's really not detention
i'm gossiping with minnie and flitwick
crookshanks and pads are here too

AND YOU ASSHOLES DIDNT INVITE ME!?

ummm
we didn't plan this!

what did you three do now?

for the first time
nothing
we were in ghoul studies like normal human beings
when umbitch came in
scolded me for my skirt and holsters and told me to go to my head of house
so i went to slughorn and he sent me to see minnie because he didn't see nothing wrong with my uniform

and the other two?

pad's long hair, tie and he wasn't wearing his robe
marlene's shirt and tie

i'm-
my god
did she see the holster?

yep
and she also saw that pad's hand was on my knee

and just for that she gave sent you to slughorn?

yep

why are you taking ghoul studies?
that class is boring

ik
but i needed something to fill my schedule between transfiguration and adavanced arithmancy
so i'm taking ghoul studies with these two dumbasses

ah
sounds boring

it is
but marlene and pads make it entertaining

i can smell the conversations between you three
for once
i'm glad i'm not taking that class with you

dude
marlene knows no shame

what did she do?

"professor, we're talking about vampires today, right? then we should watch twilight to prove that vampires shine."
miss mckinnon, vampires do not glow in the sunlight
"WELL DAMN! IVE BEEN LIED TO!"

that woman knows no shame

nope
and then she started arguing with parkinson over why twilight is a shitty saga and all that

my god

yep
and fun fact
i read all the books🤡
i don't like twilight
but i read all the books

WHY

i dunno
boredom
they ain't even half bad
idk
i'm still team jacob
HE DOESNT GLOW IN THE SUN

✨SPARKLE✨
anyways
twilight aside
why is flitwick there?

idk
something about umbitch getting on his last nerves
and once he saw me
"please tell me you exploded a color bomb on her"

👁👄👁
no wonder he's your favorite professor other than minnie

dude
padfoot almost choked on his biscuit when he heard that

i can imagine
you still with minnie?

nah
she just let us go
gave us a "warning" and that was it

god i love minnie

she said that next time i see umbitch
that i should put my feet on the desk so she can see my boots
since my uniform alone is already violating like 10 school rules

why?🤡

tie's almost always undone
nails painted black or green
studded boots
the holster
skirt is above the knee
first two buttons are undone
i carry weapons
tattoos
i roll up my sleeves
my hair's died dark blue
excess amount of rings
and i think that's it

god
the definition of a slytherin badass
i don't even care anymore
you've been dressing like that since i met you so i didn't even notice
who even looks at the school rules anymore?

beats me
look at my brother
and he's head boy

EXACTLY
i think the only two people who wear their uniforms all proper are reg and corvus
and reg is because mother forces him

oh honey
you should see him now
he just took off his tie in front of umbridge
HER FACE
BAHAHAHAHAHA

WHAT
REGULUSSSSSSSSSSSSS
IM SO PROUD

sent a photo!

BAHAHAHAHAHA
I LOVE THIS
I LOVE THIS SO MUCH
REGULUS YOU SASSY BEING

istg
if he gets detention because of this
i'm calling minnie

i have her on speed-dial...

SAMEEEEEE
i kinda put her on speed dial after the chandelier incident in fourth year

what was pads thinking when he did that?

i have no idea
almost succeeded in giving me a heart attack tho
my left arm went numb and my pulse quickened

i'm-
wow

the portraits were screeching
it was a sight

i know
moony called me while he was searching for you
and when i walked towards the grand staircase
there he was
AND HE WAS SINGING

why is your brother a dumbass?

idk
you're dating him
and i'm dating your mistress
and they're both dumbasses

so we really are the sane ones huh?

PPFFFTTT
"sAnE oNeS"
bitch please
we shaved Mrs. Norris last year
we decorated filch's office for christmas in the middle of march
AND YOU RAN AROUND HOGWARTS FULL OF FAKE BLOOD FOUR DAYS AGO
is that sane?
NO
we're called the chaos twins for a reason

yep
and minnie's favorite daughters

that too
btw
come to the great hall
the first task is in like two hours and we're all here eating lunch

k
ouw