Chapter 21

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We need to talk.

I sent the text to Kevin before my mind could be changed. I threw my phone face down on the softness of my bed and nibbled on my fingertips as I waited for the beep to sound. I waited and waited and yet, no reply came.

My anxiety was through the roof and it was only four in the afternoon. I had been home for an hour after my unscheduled and confusing visit with Dean. It took me an hour to realise I needed to sort things out with Kevin before I even thought of Dean’s proposal.

Dean and his soft lips were no match for Kevin’s plush and enticing ones. There was no comparison. My heart wanted Kevin but my mind was telling me Dean was the safer option, but what do you choose when logic clashes with your emotions?

I pulled my eyes away from my phone slowly and with great difficulty. I looked to Tommy who lay on a blanket on my bedroom floor playing. He had grown substantially in the last month and it was surprising to think he was almost eight months old already. Tommy lay on his stomach with his legs and arms spread out wide. He had a look of complete focus and concentration stitched on his chubby little face. His forehead had cute wrinkles stamped on his face and the tip of his tongue stuck out.

I leaned against the wall by my bed and watched silently as he tried to lift himself off the floor. Slowly his body rose up and then he began to rock. I found myself leaning forward in excitement while I silently willed him on. His body rocked and then his arms stretched forward. His hands started to slip under his unbalanced weight but before his body could fall, he dragged his knees across the blanket restoring his balance. He repeated his movements and my mouth dropped open.

Tommy continued his movements until he was travelling across the blanket letting it scrounge up behind him. I squealed loudly and jumped on my bed in my seat. Suddenly Tommy stopped and looked at me just as my bedroom door flew open. My parents stood in the doorway panicked. I laughed when I saw a kettle in my fathers’ hand.

“What happened?” My dad asked frantically while surveying the surroundings for any predators.

“Tommy just crawled!” I screamed, not at all trying to hide my excitement.

“What?” My mother yelled from behind my dad and pushed past him into the room. She looked at Tommy who had given up his previous excursion and chose to rather sit on his bum and push his fingers into his mouth.

“He did mom, I saw him. He finally did it.”

My mother looked unsure but then lowered herself to the ground. She made sure to leave a large gap between herself and Tommy and then she slowly stretched her arms out towards him.

“Come on Tommy.” My mother put on her high pitched baby voice and a large grin. Tommy squealed and leaned forward on his hands. Slowly Tommy moved his hands and then his legs followed. He crawled towards my mother who looked close to tears. He quickly closed the gap and my mother caught him in her hands and threw him up in the air letting him giggle.

“He crawled,” marvelled my mother. My father reached down and pinched Tommy’s cheek. He too looked close to tears. I sat quietly watching my parents gush over Tommy and my heart lifted. There was so much love flowing in the room.

My parents and I had never been the closest, it was hard having a strong relationship with people you don’t see often. Things had changed once Tommy came into the picture though.

My phone beeped on my bed, momentarily distracting me from Tommy’s achievement. I reached for it quickly, hoping it was a text from Kevin. It wasn’t.

I hope you aren’t hurt by my actions earlier.

I smiled, only Dean would be so considerate. I sent off a quick reply saying I was okay. I restarted my phone and triple checked my signal but still Kevin hadn’t replied. I was tired of his silence. I needed to see him.

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