The Sisters Of The Court

Chapter 72: Alice

St. Petersburg 1915
It's been a year, a year since the war started. Many lives lost, Russia still fighting, families grieving. I have been more busy than ever. I have joined the sisters of mercy and became a nurse. I work along side Sunny and my nieces. Alexander and Peter went to the front with Nicky and Alyosha. My Nickie stays with me. I have a special pardon from Sunny which I am most grateful for. Nickie is very disappointed with the fact that he can't serve and that he is left behind but he makes the most of it while helping me with charity events. He spends a lot of time with the big pair and even helps out as a special doctors assistant.

Nickie has been so sad that his brothers are gone but he has taken charge as the man of the house with social attendings and keeping his sisters future suitors in mind. Madeline has been visiting the wounded with the small pair while Victoria has been completely and utterly useless, fooling around and avoiding duty. She always runs off to Scarlett's and I don't see her participating in war efforts. I'm too busy to speak to her, I just hope Scarlett keeps her in check, but who am I kidding? She is turning my daughter into a mini her.

My heart pains me with Victoria's choices, she is going to regret it one day. And then she will come to me begging for forgiveness with her foolish behavior. One day when she opens her eyes she will see that she wasted her life. I bandage another wounded soldiers leg. It was amputated, poor soul doesn't know this until he wakes up. Once we finished he is taken to a bed in the main hall until he wakes up. It was our last surgery for today. I wash my hands and go to the main hall to check up on the wounded.

I rebandage Vladimir Sokolov's leg as it needs to be redone. "How is your day Duchess?" He asks me. I smile at the silly name he has given me. He is a quite charming young man, his mother is very lucky to have a son such as him. He would also make a good son in law if he were a prince but he is married and has another child on the way. I pray everyday for him, that god won't let anything happen to him. "My day is going well thank you, how is yours? Are you feeling better?" I ask as I check his temperature. "Of course Duchess! I got a letter from my old wifey, she is due in a month" he says.

I smile down at him, "How wonder! Do you have any names in mind?" I ask him as I rebandage his left arm. "Nicholas if it's a boy after our Tsar! And I was thinking Irina, after you" he explains as I flush with embarrassment, "After me?". Vladimir laughs, "of course! You saved my life multiple times! It would be an honor to name my daughter after someone like you". I smile as I finish, "I'm just helping our country and doing gods work".

"Duchess Irina, you must be one of the most saint like people I have ever met" he says. I smile to myself, "Thank you Vladimir, your words are such an honor" I say as the other nurses go around to feed the wounded for lunch. I help feed the wounded and my day ends. I then set off to charity and help them feed the poor with Ella. Then I attend meetings for planning future charity events. Before I know it it's 11:00 pm when I get home. I collapse in my office exhausted as I still have paper work to do.

I go through papers as I hear the door creak open and Walter walks in with a tray of tea. "I brought you tea since I am sure you had a long day your grace". A smile forms on my lips, "Oh Walter I can't thank you enough". He smiles at me, "Of course" he sets down tea for me and a cup for himself as he sits across from me. I take the tea and it is made just the way I like it.

"How was your day?" he asks me. "Busy, I worked most of the day at the infirmary then I went to help out at the charity, attended a meeting, now I am here doing paper work" I say as I sip on my tea. "How was yours? I hope Madeline did not keep you too busy" I chuckle. Walter laughs, "You know how she is, always very serious and tight laced, her nose always in a book".

"Have any letters came?" I asked him. "A letter for Victoria came from Alexander but that is all. Oh! I almost forgot you have gotten an invitation to a charity ball" Walter answers. At least I know now that Alexander is alright, if Victoria bothered coming here she would know that her brother wrote to her but she is too busy with Scarlett's children. And Alexander is selfish for not writing to me a letter.

"And how was Nicholas?" I ask him. "He was much better today, he came back from the infirmary and then went to visit Grand Duchess Natasha's palace" he tells me. "I have heard that her son George is back in Russia" I say as I sip on my tea. "Yes, Nicholas went to visit him today" Walter comments. Scarlett's children are raised in such a bad way all I can do is pray for them. "Nicholas reminds me so much of his father" I say as I look at my George's framed photograph on my desk. "A kind heart to anyone" I continue as a tear slips down my eye.

"You need someone to help you Irina" Walter puts his hand onto mine. "To be in the place of your passed husband". I look at him, "No one can replace him" I say sharply as anger fills me. "Not replace, step in. Your children need someone, you need someone there for you" Walter holds onto my hand tightly. I take my hand away, "I don't need anyone, my children have their uncles, I have my family, I have Father Grigori. I don't need a pathetic second husband to control my life or try to fill in a void that will never be filled!" I shout without realizing that my voice was raised or that I am standing.

Walter stays quiet as he collects our empty tea cups, "I understand your grace" he keeps his head down as he leaves the room. I sit at my desk and light a cigarette. I shut my eyes and inhale
***
"Oh god you are the most beautiful woman I've ever seen" he mutters into my cheek as he holds me close. I can't stop smiling like a fool at his words. "And you are the most handsome man I have ever set my eyes on" I smile foolishly as he presses me as close as he can to him and kisses me all over my face as I giggle.

"I love your laugh" he kisses me. I smile at him adoringly as I move his hair out of his face as he looks me in my eyes while caressing my cheek. I smile widely as I give him a gentle kiss. "I love you so much" he mutters into our kiss. "You are my soulmate" I say before we kiss again.
***
I open my eyes and fresh tears fall. I put out my cigarette and let more tears fall. Oh god why did he have to die? I start to sob as I am unable to keep it in anymore. Why did he have to do? I sob even harder. I miss him, oh god I miss him. The pain never went away. It never goes away. After I begin to calm down I go to my room. I shut the door and go to bed.