you already do so much

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hello before i get on with this chapter i just want to call out something about the fandom i am coming to dislike, and it's the treatment of tommy and tubbo in general versus how some people are treating the characters in this story. of course i am going to mention some sexual topics in this story, it is very common to experience and be educated about that kind of thing at their age. keep in mind that at this current point in the story and for most of the story karl and sapnap are FIFTEEN. when i was fifteen and even younger my mom kept grilling me about that kind of topic and telling me that if i ever did that sort of thing, i would be committing a sin and it'd be disgusting and all that. it's normal to know of this at fifteen. i'm sure a lot of you are that age exactly. however it is NOT okay imo to make sexual jokes involving these underage characters, or egg them on when they interact because you want to read "smut." As much as I'd like to explore the topic in a mature way and normalize it, I do not wish them to be sexualized, even in the form of "jokes." i am a legal adult and i try to read most of my comments, so when i see people talking about karl and sapnap like that on my story it is extremely disturbing for me. not only are they minors, but i based this book off extremely personal experiences, so when i look at that sometimes i feel like my early high school life is being sexualized, which is upsetting to me.

i'm sorry if my attitude on this comes across as harsh but it should be common sense to not see these 15 year old characters this way,,,, yet i still see it almost every day in my comments.

the reason why i brought up tommy and tubbo is because i wanted to point out that the fandom is doing very well (mostly) when it comes to the minor ccs, respecting boundaries and not being weird to them. so why is it okay to say things like that in reference to karlnap in this story (15) and not tommy and tubbo (17)? obviously it's not ok to do it to the minor ccs!! I just wanted to point out the hypocrisy here. Please PLEASE don't comment things like that on this story anymore, at least for as long as they are minors. i don't mind if you want to leave things like that on "hurt" or "angelfire" but this story is different. it's an innocent childhood love story! with pushback from systematic transphobia and religious conflict! it is supposed to be relatable to a younger audience, reassuring, and helpful. please respect my wishes, if people continue to disrespect me i will have no problem with blocking them. thank you to everyone who is understanding about it and genuinely i forgive anyone who apologizes and doesn't continue the behavior.

anyways "enjoy" this next chapter. i say "enjoy" because it does tug at the heartstrings quite a bit

cw for: crying and stuff, suicidal mention (not proven), sad

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Karl could be a light sleeper sometimes. He could be fast asleep and then the slightest bump in the night would cause him to stir and lift his head. Unfortunately, this was one of those nights, which wasn't that surprising, because it felt like every time he slept in an unfamiliar place he went on to have problems staying asleep for a long time. He had to admit though, one of the most eerie feelings in the world was waking up in the middle of the night and just looking at all of the sleeping bodies around him in the treehouse. He pressed his lips together, trying to carefully reach for his phone in his pocket without disturbing Sapnap. When he pulled it up to his face though, he had the pleasure of realizing that it was dead. He sighed softly, putting it back and closing his eyes. If he couldn't pass the time mindlessly scrolling on his phone until he inevitably passed out again, he'd just have to do that without the scrolling.

Karl ended up laying like that for a very long time, trying to focus on the warmth in his arms when he pulled Sapnap close and the soft melodies playing in his head. What he didn't expect, though, was to hear something else come out of the dead silence of the room.

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