"Agnes, please, sit down," I must've begged for the millionth time, but she ignores me and continues to run around. The mother sitting across from me gives me a dirty look, and I give her the finger. Tisha sucks her teeth, yanking my hand down. "What?" I ask her loudly. "She needs to mind her dam-" my eyes dart to Agnes, who's still running around the two tables, and I immediately shut up. I don't want her to hear me like that. "Still. Agnes is a kid and can play around without being judged." I'm only worried about her hurting herself.
"William!" Agnes shrieks before crashing into me and ramping her arm in my side. I wince as she climbs onto my lap. "Hi, Will!" She rests her hands on my cheeks and stares deeply into my eyes. I smile at her.
"Hi, Agnes."
"Okay!" She jumps off me and continues her running, and I laugh. She's adorable. I'm glad she's enjoying herself. "Wait, William!" Agnes is at my side, yanking my arm before I know it. "Get up! Get up! I want to be a monkey! William!"
"Okay, okay," I chuckle, rising to my feet, and hold out my arm. Agnes kicks off her flats, grips my arm firmly then press her feet to my leg, and begins to walk up my body. She's still so tiny so I don't have to put too much strength into holding her up.
"Will, look!" In one quick movement, Agnes throws herself back and wraps her legs around my upper arm, looking like an actual monkey. I sit back in my seat, and she pouts as she untangles her legs and arm from my arm. "Hey."
"You just got your brace off. You should be more careful," I tell her.
"My hand looks weird now."
"It'll heal in a few hours."
She rolls her eyes. "Few hours too long." I press my lips together to smother my laughter.
The door covered in Dora The Explorer and Paw Patrol stickers open and a nurse stands in the doorway. "Agnes Hensdela?" She says loudly, and I wince at the reminder of Agnes' birth name. But Agnes will be a Granger once I adopt her.
"Let's go," I say, standing up. Agnes wraps her limbs around me, and I cross the room. Tisha remains in her seat. I already told her I want to go alone with Agnes. If I'm being honest with myself, I'm nervous, and I can't have Tisha there, I need to do this on my own. I've never taken a kid to the doctors before, and-I know I shouldn't be because Agnes is fine, but I'm fucking horrified of what they might say. My mind just takes a wrong turn.
I follow the nurse through the door and into a small hallway. We enter the last door on the right. The room's small, extremely small, it could probably fit ten people-which isn't a lot-and the white walls are covered with space-theme stickers. I place Agnes on the bed, and she instantly reaches for the Saturn on the wall.
"What seems to be the problem today?" The nurse asks.
"A few weeks ago Agnes broke her finger, and the doctor said we would remove her brace ourselves, but I want to get her hand checked out," I explain while she writes everything down. "You know, to be safe."
"There's weird marks on my hand," Agnes chimes in. I smile at her then kiss the top of her head.
"It's going to heal," I tell her.
"Your daddy's right," the nurse says, moving to my side. Agnes' eyes widen, her lips curling into a wide and bright grin. I return her smile, and we lean into each other. "The weird marks will be gone before you know it," the nurse continues.
As good as it feels to be called Agnes' father, I want Agnes to call me her father.
The doctor enters the room, and the nurse instantly moves to him. She shows him the chart; everything she wrote down, and he nods then turns to me. "Mr. Hensdela-"
"Actually, it's Mr. Granger. I'm Agnes' foster...brother." It pains me to call Agnes my foster sister, she means much more to me than that. A brother's love is different from a father's. I feel the tension in the room shift, and the nurse makes an apologetic face then frowns at Agnes. "She's fine," I snap. "We're fine." My voice comes out strained and not like me. In the corner of my eyes, I can see Agnes' tiny hands reaching for my face. I turn to her, and she begins to play with my beard. I need to shave.
"Okay. I'm sorry," I whisper to her.
********
It took the doctor less than five minutes to check Agnes' hand, and it pissed me off. He could've put a little more effort into making sure my kid was okay. It was so bad, Agnes had to drag me out of there. I didn't fully calm down until we pulled up to Tisha's. I dropped her off and picked up Robbie. "Where are we going?" He asks as I back out of the driveway.
"We're getting ice cream."
*********
We had to drive off the island for the frozen yogurt place with unlimited toppings, but it's alright. Agnes got cherry ice cream with a bunch of cut up strawberries and kiwis as toppings, Robbie got strawberries ice cream with M&M's, crushed up Oreo, and gummy bears, and I got chocolate with strawberries. The strawberries are for Agnes. Despite the cold weather and eating ice cream, we sit outside.
I'm about to bring a spoonful of ice cream to my mouth when I notice Agnes' coat isn't all the way zipped. I drop my spoon in the ice cream and place my cup to the side. "Agnes." I reach out and fix her coat as she attempts to take a bite.
"Imma get napkins," Robbie says then gets up and walks back into the store.
"I like Robbie," Agnes says. "Can you foster him too?"
"Um, I can't. He's too old for me to foster."
"Oh," she frowns as she circles a strawberry with the tip of her spoon. "Can he still be part of our family?"
Our family.
"Well, that's up to him. The same way it's up to you."
She looks up at me. "You mean if I want to live with you, be part of your family." I nod. I hope she can see that she is my family. I might be alright with Tisha, but she's not my family. And for my sister, I'm not sure, she spent so many years away and behind bars, we sort of just drifted apart. But I don't see that happening with Agnes. I won't let it happen. Agnes is the only true family I have now. "William?"
"Yeah, kid?"
"Can I call you my daddy?"
I smile at her. "Do you want me to be your daddy?"
Words begin to pour out of her mouth like a waterfall. "Yes, but I was scared that you only wanted to my uncle or something or even as my foster brother-" she cringes "-dunno," she shrugs, dropping her hands to her lap. "I guess I just thought if my birth dad didn't want to be my dad, why would you?"
"Agnes, I'm not that..." I want to say asshole but I can't. "I'm not him, okay? I already see you as my kid, and there's nothing-not even you-in this world that could change my mind." She makes a face, and I somehow know what she means. "My daughter."
She nods violently as her eyes pool. I pull her into my embrace and kiss the top of her head. "I love you," she cries.
"I love you more."
YOU ARE READING
Fighting For What's Missing
Adventure"People you trust? What about her? What happens when she's stuck with people she doesn't trust?" When William Granger agreed to babysit for a few hours, he didn't know that he was agreeing for his whole life to turn upside down. After finding out t...
