-Cat maid cafe-

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~Smut, kinda crack cuz Hu Tao's here again-

Yeah...You read the tittle, didn't you? Then be ready for some cat maid shit. CAT MAID ZHONGLI SUPREMACY ⁉❗💦💥🔥💢✔⚠

Also, this is a modern AU cuz uh- Well you read the tittle. So wangsheng is... a cat maid cafe :]
Hu Tao shows up to cause chaos again too so uh- Yeah...

I am so sorry in advance.


As Hu Tao was running along the streets of Liyue, handing out her posters for the newest addition to town... the "Wangsheng Cafe" which was apparently like a Hooter's but well- maids.

She managed to catch a certain ginger walking around, she immediately ran and caught up to him, alarming him slightly before handing out a paper to him and trying to catch her breath, trying to speak to him...

"Oi...Ginger bitch- Uh.. I forgot your name--"

"A-are you serious?--"

"Whatever, I'll just keep coming up with nicknames until I remember your actual name. Ahem- So, butt-plug dude--"

"Excuse me?- What...?--"

"--I'm sure you've heard of my newest workplace?"

"The maid cafe...Yeah?-"

"Well, we have a new worker there that I'd really like you to meet, hehe..."

"Yeah...I don't know if you've heard but I'm not really 'interested in girls', y'know?"

"Yes ginger pubes, we know you're gay."

"Ginger pubes?!-"

"But I never said our new worker was a girl either. So please, just come check them out when you can?"

Childe sighed. "I'll think about it..."

"Think about it for too long and I'll find your address."

He huffed at her. "I'll go once you remember my actual name."

"Alrighty Ajax! Or do you prefer Tartaglia? Or maybe Childe... Whatever- See ya' at my cafe!!"

"Wha-- You bitch! You knew the entire time?! And you know my real name too- what!?"

"Adios, dish soap!"

"Dish...soap?- Wait--" Before he could complain about the nickname, she was gone.

She once again left off to give people more papers. Childe assumed she'd be busy handing those out all afternoon long, so he figured he'd get dressed and go to the cafe now since he knew she most likely wouldn't be there.

It was already 4pm, he had no idea when they closed yet he decided to take his time in getting ready. Arriving at the place he was staying in, taking a shower, getting dressed all fancy and finally being done an hour later.

He made his drive to the cafe, noticing that there weren't many people there, since the sun was starting to set and usually people don't stick around much once it's nightfall.

He walked to a counter, which he could only assume was the bar area, and saw a lady standing there, in a cute little maid outfit, cleaning some wine glasses...

"Uhm...Hi- Is Hu Tao around?"

"Oh- I'm afraid not, she's very busy these days, trying to get more customers... But, I can have you seated, if you'd like"

"Will you be serving me too?"

"Oh no, I just handle the bar. We'll have someone else come to serve you and entertain you."

Childe was confused on what the lady meant by 'entertain' yet he decided to pass it by as one of those 'restaurant' things...

The lady took him to a seat and then left, leaving him to feel like one of those people who got stood up by their dates and is now going to eat alone while he waited for someone to come and at least ask what he wanted...

Almost thirty minutes go by, and Childe heard footsteps, followed by a voice...

"I'll take your order..." Childe's sight suddenly shot to the person, who had a much deeper voice than expected.

He looked surprised as he saw a tall man, he assumed around the same height as him. He analyzed his appearance, noting stuff he saw, from his dark, brunette hair to the cute little tail with a bell and a bow at the end of it that he assumed the man was force to wear in order to work here.

After that, all he could focus on was the man's shinning, captivating, amber colored eyes. His attention then shifting to the fact that the man had a maid outfit on, cat ears and tail, and a collar that made him look very cute as Childe saw him.

"Uhm- Sir...Are you okay?-" The man said, as he noticed Childe's trance and the staring made him slightly nervous.

"Oh- Right...Uhm- Can I have some..." He dozed off again, thinking of what he could order that would make this man come back as many times as he could.

"Here's the menu, in case you are unsure of what we have to offer." He smiled slightly as he got closer to hand Childe the menu, although hitting one of the table legs and falling on to Childe...

Fortunately, he landed on Childe's lap. With Childe being quick enough to grip on to him, grabbing him by the uniform in one hand and, unintentionally, his ass with the other. While the man grabbed his shoulders, slightly squeezing from the startle of the fall, making his nails dig into Childe's skin slightly.

The man's face turned red, noticing that he had just messed up greatly... "I-i'm so sorry- I'm so clumsy a-and..."

He paused, taking his hands off Childe's shoulders but shooting his gaze up to see Childe. The brunette's bowtie had untied itself accidentally, and Childe had bitten it, holding it in his mouth in a very teasing manner.

They both remained staring at each other for a while, not noticing the position they sat in and the fact that people were watching.

Childe dropped the tie, then smirking slightly at the man while pushing him slightly upwards.

"May I ask your name, kind sir?"

The other froze, not knowing what to respond to that... His own name.


"Don't be shy now. I won't bite...Well- I might~" He teased, slowly pulling him closer and closer with each word he spoke.

"Zhongli...M-my name is Zhongli."

"Well then, mister Zhongli... May I take you somewhere with me?"


Yeah...To be continued.

The chapter picture is the scene I just described in the story so like- Yuh. ⚠✔💢🔥💥💯💦❗⁉🔊🔉👈😐
(Also, the art isn't mine... Just in case hehe :'])

I literally don't know what else to say due to severe brain damage cuz of doing exams for an entire week... But they're over now so we good 😎👍

I should post this before my battery runs out- I'm on 5% lmfao... s e n d  h e l p.

Thanks for reading!
Kk bai!! 🐸🌸

Word count: 1102

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