Nothing but Heartbreak

11. You are a bomb

To say I was dreading getting drinks with Harlan was an understatement. The only thing getting me through this was the fact that Jade and Kieran would be there to buffer. I'd be able to easily avoid him and divert all my attention to the newlyweds.

When I walked into the bar it was hard to miss Harlan's mop of blond hair. He was sat at a table by the back window sipping on a beer. He was looking down and had yet to even notice that I had arrived. I quickly noticed he was alone, figuring Jade and Kieran had not arrived yet I went to the bar to try to stall the time until they arrived. The less time I had to spend with Harlan the better.

I thanked the bartender as she passed me my beer and begrudgingly headed towards Harlan.

"Oh hey." He smiled as a sat in the seat across from him.

"Where are the newlyweds?" I questioned.

I watched as he bit his lip slightly as if trying to think what to say.

"They were busy and couldn't make it." He shrugged.

I felt anger rush through me. He had lied to get me here, he was trying to hurt me more than he already has. I could not sit through drinks with him. I was trying to move on, to stop loving him but he seemed to want to make that harder for me.

"You couldn't have told me that before I drove all the way here? It would have saved me the gas and the money I spent on this beer." I immediately stood up having no interest in staying.

"I made no promises that they would show up tonight, I only said that I would invite them. You promised me drinks and I intend to have a nice night even without my sister here." Harlan watched me with a stern look on his face.

He was being calm and serious. It was not a side I saw from Harlan very often. It was something I usually only saw from him when it came to his sister.

"I said one drink and I guess it would be a waste not to finish my beer." I sat back down taking a sip of my drink.

The silence between us lasted longer than what was comfortable. It made this whole thing more awkward than I had thought it would be. Harlan and I had always easily bantered back and forth and there was never awkwardness but after how we left things the morning after Jade's wedding there was definitely lots to be discussed and I don't think either of us really knew where to start.

"What did I do to make you hate me so much, Ava?" He asked softly as if he was scared to start the conversation.

"I don't want to talk about this." I deflected.

"Come on, we used to be pretty close. Even if you were my sister's best friend I always considered you my friend too. We were solid, we always had fun together, and then it was like one day you woke up and decided you did not need me in your life anymore." I could hear the hurt in his voice.

It broke me to think about how both of us had hurt each other without really knowing what we were doing. I had thought that distancing myself from Harlan was a good thing for both of us. I honestly did not think he would care if I was in his life or not. He never seemed to ever need me around.

"Will you just drop it? I rather not do this with you." I pushed for him to leave it be, going through the past was not a good idea.

Doing this would mean I would need to be honest with him. I would have to open myself up to him and I knew if I did that and ended up getting hurt it would be hard to recover from that. At least with keeping my feelings to myself I could lie to myself sometimes and pretend he ever liked me back. But hearing him say he never had feelings for me would crush me.

"No, you keep pushing me away and avoiding the answer. I am not leaving this bar until you tell me what I did."

"Why do you even care? Why do you even want to know?" I snapped.

"Because if I don't know, how am I supposed to fix it?" He raised his voice slightly obviously getting frustrated with the conversation.

"What is there to fix? We were barely friends, we hadn't talked in a year and my life was good before you came back here. I was seeing someone who was nice and I had my life together. You are like a bomb Harlan, you come into people's lives and just blow it up not even caring about the damage you've done."

"Is that how you feel? You really think that I ruin your life?" He questioned.

I chugged the rest of my beer slamming the glass a little too harshly on the table.

"I had a drink with you, you got what you wanted." I stood up from the chair ready to leave.

"Ava please, I don't want this for us, I don't want you to leave" The look he was giving me made me pause.

"Why do you want me to stay?" Maybe I could get a real answer, maybe I'd figure out what was going through his head.

"I want you in my life. Is that really such a bad thing?"

I did not want to feel let down but I did. I wanted, no needed him to say he had feelings. I could not be just his friend, at least not until I had fully moved on. I couldn't watch him be with other people, I had allowed myself to be hurt by him too many times in the past.

"I can't do this anymore, not with you." I felt defeated, I wanted Harlan so badly it hurt. I was in more pain than it was healthy to be in over a guy who had no clue how I felt.

"Ava.." He said softly looking at me with hurt in his eyes.

"Just don't" I shook my head and turned, retreating out of the bar.

Once I sat in my car I let the tears flow. I needed to get away, I needed to free myself of him before it was too late.

A/n:

Harlan and Ava are arguing....again. No real surprise here haha.

Anyways I hope you enjoyed this chapter and if you did don't forget to comment and vote!!

-Cora Leigh