Joshaya one shots

College surprise

Long distance sucks.

Joshua Matthews sighed as he closed his laptop down after finishing his FaceTime with Maya. She was all the way in London studying abroad for a semester for her art. He missed her like crazy. It had been a month since she had been gone but it felt like forever.

He thought that it would be okay. He actually thought that it might be good for them to spend some time apart during the semester. After all, time was supposed to make the heart grow fonder. Or however the heck that statement went.

He had been the one to reassure Maya to go, told her to live out her dream and this was just one step closer to that. Now he wasn't necessarily regretting it, but he wished that he had listened to her concerns more when she was trying to give him reasons for her not to go.

He didn't want her to regret it later. So he had played the tough act and gave her a million reasons to go. So she did. And now he hated himself for it.

Fifteen weeks wasn't so bad. It was almost four months. He thought that was better than four whole years of being apart. A lot better. He thought they would be able to handle it.

Well actually, Maya was handling it well. Better than well actually. She looked amazing and happy. And he was happy that she was happy. He was the one that wasn't handling it well. He was a wreck.

He loved Maya, so much. And he didn't realize just how much until she wasn't with him all the time. They had been dating for a year and it hadn't been a week that she was gone before he started losing sleep and getting stressed with her not being there. It was crazy how much he had come to depend on her.

His birthday was tomorrow. Also Valentine's Day. A double blow that Maya wouldn't be here. Maya had a busy schedule and wouldn't be able to FaceTime him. So she had talked with him and told him that his gift should be coming in tomorrow. He had enjoyed being on the phone with her despite the time difference. He wouldn't get a lot of sleep but it was totally worth it.

Sighing, he placed his computer down on the floor of his bedroom as he reached over and turned the lamp off. He pulled the covers over his chest and laid on his back staring up at the ceiling with his hands resting behind his head.

One thing had come out of the distance between them. It had given Josh a lot of time to really think. About his feelings towards Maya and about where their relationship was headed.

One thing was for sure. He knew he had never felt this way about anyone before. He knew that with how intense his feelings seemed to be getting by the day, that this wasn't just normal feelings that someone feels for someone else. This was much more than that.

It made him want to start having the real conversations with Maya. The 'what's our next step' type of conversation. The 'do you think of me when you think of a future'. He realized that out of the year they've been dating, he had no idea what she thought about marriage of kids. He had always had a pretty straight forward attitude about it. Anyone who knew him knew that he wanted a big family with a great marriage. But was that what Maya wanted?

She had never brought up marriage or kids, and he never asked her. Did she think about them having a family and getting married one day? Josh certainly hoped so. Because he couldn't imagine spending the rest of his life being partnered with anyone else.

Was it time that he brought in moving in together? Maya was a junior and next fall she would be officially entering into her last year of art school. Her and Riley had been rooming together since the start of college and Josh wondered if Maya would even consider moving in with him before graduation.

Shoving the covers off of him, Josh realized that he wouldn't be getting any sleep tonight. His mind was running a thousand thoughts at a time and it was giving him anxiety.