Chapter 153

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At those words, all heads turned toward Remus, gaping at him in surprise. They were all too in shock to notice that Tonks's hair had turned white for a second, then changed to silver, and the next moment it suddenly turned to her original brown color.

    "Remus, I appreciate your offer," Dumbledore started, giving him a sympathetic look as though he could understand what he was doing and why he was doing it, "but I want you to take a moment and think about how dangerous this is."

    "I know." Remus nodded his head firmly. "But if we're going to try to talk the werewolves out of joining Voldemort, we need someone who's one of them. I'm a werewolf. I can fit in with them easily, and when I've gained their trust, I'll try to make them see reason."

    "Are you out of your freaking mind!?" Sirius suddenly raved, glaring at his direction with wide eyes. "Remus, not all werewolves are like you. Some of them are actual monsters! Their leader is Greyback! Or have you forgotten what he's like!?"

    "I know perfectly well what they are capable of, Sirius —"

     "I really don't think you do!" Sirius retorted. "Greyback attacks children just for enjoyment! He bites people even when the moon is not full! He was the one who bit you when you were only five! And you think you can just go and live with them!? Just like that!?"

     "I know what I'm signing myself up for, Sirius, thank you very much," said Remus in his usual calm tone, though he was now looking down at the table, avoiding everyone's eyes.

     Huffing loudly to himself, Sirius turned around to face Jenna. "Don't you have anything to say on the matter?"

    Jenna pursed her lips together for a moment, glancing at Remus. "This is Remus's decision. Not mine."

    "Thank you, Jenna," said Remus, giving her a weak appreciating smile.

     "I didn't say I was done speaking," Jenna said sharply, glaring at him, before turning to face Sirius again. "If Remus wants to go and get himself killed, that's completely up to him. He's clearly gone mad. Probably hit his head against a rock or something. Maybe getting himself killed will get him back to his senses."

    "Again, thank you, Jenna," said Remus, though this time it was sarcastically.

    "You know you always have my support," Jenna told him with a fake sweet smile, holding her anger in to release it all on him once the Order meriting was over.

     Ignoring everyone, Remus looked back at Dumbledore, saying more firmly than before, "I can do this. I'll be able to return once a month or so to report back. I know where they live and I know where to find them."

    There was a small pause, before Dumbledore finally spoke again, "Very well. How much time do you need to prepare yourself for the journey?"

     "I can leave immediately," Remus said without a single moment of hesitation.

     Sirius seemed out of words as he stared at him in disbelief. Even Jenna was having a hard time believing that this wasn't just a foolish joke, and that Remus was actually thinking about living with other werewolves undercover for the next few months.

    After a few hours, as soon as Dumbledore dismissed everyone and announced the end of the meeting, Remus abruptly got to his feet and was first to leave the kitchen.

    Sirius and Jenna glanced at each other in horror, not believing that this was actually happening, and so suddenly. They both got up to follow after him, but before either of them could get the chance, they saw Tonks run out of the kitchen angrily.

Sirius was about to follow after them, but Jenna quickly stopped him by grabbing his wrist, holding him back.

"What are you doing!?" Sirius questioned, frowning. "We have to talk him out of it!"

"Let Tonks talk to him," said Jenna, though she was unsure how their conversation was going to go. "She has the right to tell him how she feels about it."

"So we're just going to let him walk off like that!?" Sirius retorted.

"Nothing you and I say is going to change his mind," Jenna spoke in a small voice, though she feared her friend's life with every bone in her body.

Jenna could remember all those years back, when she was supposed to go away on her mission, undercover as a Death Eater. And back then, nothing anyone said was going to change her mind.

As much as she hated Remus's decision, she knew that he had to come back to his senses and realize what he was doing wrong on his own.

***

"So that's it!?" Tonks yelled after Remus, trying to catch up with his fast pace as he walked up the stairs. "You're just gonna leave like that!? Without even a goodbye!? Or even a reason why!?"

     Remus didn't stop and kept on walking with Tonks still following after him. "I'm doing this for the Order."

     "Rubbish!" Tonks scoffed angrily. But when he didn't stop, she leaped forward and grabbed onto his arm, holding him back. "So you'd rather risk your own life and live in filthy caves with other werewolves than to be with me? Does my love mean that little to you!?"

    Remus wanted to look back at her, to say that it wasn't true, but something was holding him back.

"You deserve someone better," was all he managed to say.

     "But I don't love someone else! I love you!" Tonks was at the verge of crying, her tears so close to streaming down. But she was doing everything in her power to hold them back.

     Remus closed his eyes, still refusing to turn around to look at her, knowing that if he did, he wouldn't be able to leave.

    "I'm sorry," he whispered.

    And then, before Tonks could get the chance to open her mouth and protest, he shook his arm out of her grip and paced toward the door, leaving Grimmauld Place and Apparating away.

     Tonks stood frozen on the spot, suddenly finding it hard to breathe. And the moment the door was closed behind him, she finally let down her tears.

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