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CHAPTER TWENTY
little talks
JAMES FOUND BETTY sitting and staring out at the back fields. She was just sitting in the middle of one of the corridors that lead out to the Forbidden Forest. He stopped running with the boys to go and help Remus to look at her. The December 14th full moon reflected off of her hair as the wind made it shift and her brother's sweater was tightly clutched to her body. James knew that she's probably circled the date in some calendar that she had up in her dorm that probably had dried flowers taped to it, knowing girls like her. However, he wondered if she always did this — looked and waited for her brother to come back.
A small sadness washed over him like low tide on the beach — it wasn't all consuming, but it was there and it was real. That had become a pattern for him with his dealings with Betty. And it was a strange break from the cracks and bangs of emotions that he felt on a daily basis.
He wondered what it was like for her to be so uncertain about the fate of her brother — one of the only people that she had left — and yet know that there was nothing she could do about it. Remus had practically begged his friends to not tell Betty about their animagus forms and James didn't understand it, but now he did. Because Betty would've tried to join them and Remus didn't want her hurt for the very reason that she was sitting there right then.
James pressed his lips together, and, for once, followed his gut when it came to Betty Lupin. He wasn't trying to outsmart her. Not even close. So, he walked forward — with every step defying the whispers of Hogwarts and the yelling of both of them in the common room. He came to a stop next to her and hesitated before carefully sitting down.
She looked over at him and he saw the tired desperation in her eyes. She'd been through his countless times — more than him or the boys — and yet, it still slashed into her and made her bleed. She would've yelled at him — screamed at him and beat his chest, blaming him for everything that happened even though she only felt the blame herself, deep down. But, she couldn't. She didn't have the energy.
"Hey," she whispered as her eyes remained glued to James.
"Everything's going to be alright," James said with a faint smile. "It always is."
"I know," she mumbled with a short, mirthless laugh. "I just can't stop myself from thinking about the worst."
"I mean ... I'd rather be prepared for the worst and have the best happen than the opposite," James said softly.
