Can it be? | Pansy Parkinson

XV- Families

Pansy's POV

I couldn't get the conversation I had with Theo and Blaise after the Quidditch match out of my mind. It had been a week and it still occupied my thoughts, especially after I hung out with Anna. We never actually hung out just the two of us and somehow, I was glad.

I knew I liked Anna. It was hard not to. I couldn't ignore the way my heart beat faster every time I spend time with her or whenever we hug. I couldn't ignored the way the feeling of her skin on mine always lingered or the way I missed her warmth after we hugged, especially now that it was colder. Even if I tried, I would still be conscious of how worried I was when she was hanging on her broom with one hand and how I was entirely focused on her. I couldn't ignore the way she was almost always on my mind. Wether it be her wide smile whenever she sees us, her laugh when one of us said something funny or her eyes shining when she talked about quidditch with Blaise.

But no matter how much I couldn't ignored it, I had too. I knew my father wouldn't be pleased with me befriending Gryffindors, I couldn't imagine how angry he would be if he found out I had feelings for not only a Gryffindor, but a girl who was also Harry Potter's sister. He would much prefer if I had feelings for Theo or Malfoy, even Blaise would be better. That's why I knew I could never act on my feelings. She probably didn't even feel the same.

That was why whenever we hung out I tried to talk to Neville and Luna more, but when she was the only one with us, it was hard. She would talk to Theo a lot, but Blaise liked talking to her or at least following their conversation so I couldn't just talk to him. After five times in this situation, I decided to find another way to avoid Anna. Whenever she came to us alone, I left, saying I had homework to do.

It hurt to ignore her, but I couldn't risk falling for her. She probably didn't even notice, I've heard her laugh when I wasn't there, she was fine without me. Why wouldn't she be anyway? She didn't have feelings for me, I was sure of that. Perhaps this would help me move on. Three weeks after I had started to ignore Anna, someone grabbed my arm and dragged me in an empty classroom.

"What the fuck!" I yelled.

"We need to talk, Pansy," Theo said seriously.

"There was no need to drag me like that, Theo."

"Oh but there was," he answered. I never heard him talk so seriously and he sounded kind of angry.

"Fine, what's going on?" I asked.

"That's what I'm wondering, Pansy. What the fuck are you doing?"

"What are you talking about?"

"I'm talking about you always leaving when Anna comes to us or always talking with Nev and Luna instead, Pansy! That's what I'm talking about," he told me, his voice raising. I looked away.

"Why do you care anyway?" I asked.

"I care because on of my friends is hurting, that's why."

"What are you talking about? I'm not hurting," I said, confused.

"It's not you, Pansy. Did you think Anna wouldn't notice you ignoring her?"

"Oh please, she's not hurt," I denied.

"She is. You don't see it but she is. You don't see her face falling every time you leave, the way she tries to laugh but always ends up frowning while she looks at where you left. Or the way she looks at you as if she was begging you to look at her when you only talk to Neville and Luna," he said and I fell quiet. "And you definitely didn't hear the pain and confusion in her voice when she asked me and Blaise if she'd done something wrong."