Cleveland: Damn I can't find it!
Columbus: Find what?
Cleveland: My will to live.
Dayton, holding a gun and a flamethrower: North Carolina, you claim to have invented the airplane.
Dayton: Well I will claim his life insurance.
Cleveland, holding a dog: I'm gonna name him Swagger!
Cincinnati: Really? That's what you're naming the dog?
Cleveland: Shut up you Bengal bitch.
Columbus: We protected you from the bitches up north! Why do you like them?!
Toledo: I border them.
Cleveland, holding Cincinnati: Hey Kentucky!
Kentucky: Yeah?
Cleveland: Please take this fucking disgrace as one of your own.
Cleveland: 17 and 0, 17 AND 0!
Cincinnati: You really think the Browns are gonna go 17 and 0 next season, what are you? Delusional?
Cleveland: Oh I'm sorry, which team won the first round of the playoffs?
Columbus, watching his family get destroyed by the rust belt: Ope I'm gonna vibe and cry.
Lansing: Yeah so-
Columbus: Ope I'm sorry who gave northern fuckers like you the right to speak?!
Yes I'm probably gonna do more with them
YOU ARE READING
Statehouse stuff
RandomI write incorrect quotes, oneshots, and occasionally headcanons. Also fair warning, I love Ohio
