Maybe tomorrow

Chapter 33

The rest of the family wouldn’t come today for which I am sure at least the hospital staff was thankful for because despite the big and nice room, it got a little too crowded when 6 or 7 people were in it together.
Celia however would be there and when I checked my phone outside of the café, she had sent me a message, asking for the address and directions to the hospital.

I

quickly answered and because I was too busy typing, I didn’t even realize that I had been walking towards the busy road until Damien’s grabbed me and pulled me back just before a huge red truck drove by that would have torn me into little pieces.
 
“Watch where you are going, Princess.”, Damien teased while I gazed back at the truck. It took me a few seconds to overcome the shock while I still stood there, my phone in my hand, pressed against Damien’s warm chest.
 
Finally, I cleared my throat and turned around, slightly embarrassed.
“Sorry. I was just texting Celia. She is coming with us to the hospital to see Charlie.”, I explained apologetically, and he smirked a little.
 
“Just watch your step next time. I can’t always be around to save you.”, he teased me and shot him a dark glare that he just ignored.
 
“I don’t need you to save me. I just need you to let me go. We have to go to the hospital, remember?”, I asked smiling, and tried to step back but he didn’t let me, instead he tightened his grip which brought me even closer to him and therefore also to his lips that were still twisted into a smirk, the kind that made my knees weak.
 
“I do remember. But I wanted to thank you. You might think that you being a distraction is a disadvantage, but I strongly disagree.”, he smirked, and my heart fluttered.
“So just to clarify again: I am only good at being a distraction?”, I asked with a raised eyebrow and he shook his head while his grin widened.
“No that’s by far not the only thing you are good at.”
 
Suddenly his lips were only millimeters from mine, and I could feel his hot breath on my skin. He was waiting for me to take the final step and for a second I thought about stepping back on him just like he had done with me earlier but when I looked into his deep blue eyes, that still fascinated me like on the first day, I forgot all about my plan, as well as the fact that I had just almost been killed by a truck or that Damien little brother was working for a mafioso.
 
I finally closed the gap between us and pressed my mouth onto his and I hadn’t even realized until now how much I had mourned the feeling of his kisses, a feeling that I would never get tired of.
My stomach was twisting in a knot and my knees got weaker while Damien’s arms were still wrapped around my waist. My hands almost automatically made their way up to brush through his soft, wavy hair just to go back down to his neck to pull him closer.
 
He tasted sweet and hot at the same time and even though there was no possible way I could have moved even closer to him, I still pressed myself further against him and at that moment I didn’t care how desperate I behaved.
The kiss probably lasted a while, but it still hadn’t felt long enough when Damien suddenly pulled pack. I was out of breath, but I could have kissed him for much longer. But while my gaze was resting on Damien’s slightly heated face, he looked around and I could feel his tense muscles under the palms of my hands that were resting against his chest now.
 
The moment was over, and I followed his gaze, expecting to see someone behind us in the park but there was nothing.
At least nothing worth mentioning that would explain his sudden withdrawal. I couldn’t help but feel slightly offended. Was I such a bad kisser that he was looking for excuses to get out of it?
It wasn’t my fault that he clearly had more experience than me.
 
“What is it?”, I asked, still trying to catch my breath.
Damien didn’t answer for a few seconds until he sighed and relaxed a little, responding.
 
“Nothing.” and turning back to me but all the intimacy had vanished and suddenly I became aware of the fact again, that we were in the middle of the sidewalk next to a busy road.
Embarrassed I lowered my gaze.
When had I become a girl that made out with guys in public like this? Because the kiss hadn’t exactly been clean…
 
His smile returned when he noticed my heavy breathing and my deep red cheeks. He laughed a little, pulling me closer again while I rested my head on his chest to calm my heart that was beating faster then what could possibly be healthy and my stomach as well, because it was all tingly and twisted like I had just been on a rollercoaster.
 
I touched my slightly swollen lips that still prickled from the kiss and waited for the strength to return to my legs that still felt like jello.
But the feeling in my legs there was also my guilty conscience returning and when I closed my eyes for a second I could recall the image of the man with the tattoos and the gun.
 
Suddenly I felt cold, despite Damien’s embrace and I tried my best not to think about the fact that I had broken the promise I had made to him. I was worried, not just for my own sake though.
Also, for Graham’s and Charlie’s. Afterall were the people Graham worked with dangerous and if Graham worked for Talia’s father, he basically worked for her too. And Talia had already hated me without even knowing that I had slept with her ex-boyfriend, what would she do if she knew that we had a son together?
My stomach twisted again and this time it was because of pure fear.
 
And then there was Damien.
Now that I thought about it, he was probably part of the reason too, why I agreed to keep Graham’s promise. It was selfish, but I didn’t want to have to be the one who told him that the reason his brother wouldn’t talk to him was because Graham was in love with the woman Damien almost got engaged to. I could only imagine how it would be for Damien to know the truth.
 
“I think we should probably get going. We have to be at the hospital in a little more than half an hour and it takes at least 20 minutes to get there.”
Thankful for the distraction I let Damien grab my hand as we started to walk back to the apartment.
I shot him a side-glance and with a certain satisfaction I noticed that our make out session had left marks on him too. His breath was slightly irregular, and his cheeks were a little rosier than usual.
Also, his hair was messy which was obviously my fault, but still.
 
We didn’t have much time to talk anymore today. On the way to the hospital Charlie constantly talked about his new kindergarten and what Clary had told him about it already, and inside the hospital, Celia had already grabbed my arm and pulled me outside the room before I could even greet Doctor Thomas.
 
“What happened? And why the hell is your hair so messy? Have looked into the mirror in the past 24 hours?”, she asked after we had found a few chairs next to a large window at the end of the hallway.
I flushed when I remembered our kiss and that seemed to be answer enough already because Celia started grinning.
 
“Oh, wow. What exactly happened between you two love birdies?”
Blood was rushing into my cheeks and I bit my lip, but Celia’s impatient and inquiring look forced me to answer.
 
“It was just a kiss. Nothing worth mentioning really. We mainly talked.”, I responded, and Celia raised an eyebrow, apparently not convinced.
 
“It was not just a kiss. You like him, admit it.”, she demanded, and I sighed deeply. I did like him.
But it was so much more complicated than that.
 
“I don’t know. I mean yes, but also I don’t want to read too much into it. We’re still only getting to know each other, and how am I supposed to know whether he is really interested?”, I asked doubtingly but Celia just rolled her eyes.
 
“Are you serious? He risked everything by breaking up with Talia. I admit that he definitely has potential to be a playboy, but even though I called him things that I shouldn’t repeat in a children’s hospital, after what he was like in the beginning, I don’t think that he would pull off something like that. And he has been staring at you constantly while we were in there.” She nodded in the direction of the treatment room.
 
I smiled a little when I remembered how furious she had been after I had told her crying on the phone what had happened during my first week here in New York.
But I still frowned a little.
“We are still from two completely different worlds. How long could our relationship possibly last considering not only what happened with Charlie, which is enough to argue about for a lifetime. And also, he is at work 90% of the time.”, I argued, and Celia grabbed my hand.
 
“I know you are scared because of what happened with Malcolm and Connor, but you should at least give it a try. For Charlie, and for yourself. I know you blame yourself for a lot of what happened, but you deserve to be happy. And if Damien dares to hurt you, I will not falter to kick his ass, no matter who his parents are or how much money he has.”
 
I laughed and squeezed Celia’s hand to let her know how thankful I was for our friendship. It was only a small gesture but she knew what I meant.