We the Weirdos

Chapter Six

You know how time kinda stops when someone's throwing a punch at you? Those ridiculous slow-mo's?

Anyway, those are lies. After one punch in Spooner's (yes, he has a new name now), the guy repeated punched him. Again and again. In any other situation I would've been very pleased to see the scene right before me, but now is not that specific situation.

I'm still confused. Why does the big guy hate him? Unless his name is Forker or Knifer (ouch can't imagine that) he'd have to have a real reason to hate Spooner.

Then my brain suddenly came back. It took a very short hiatus, needless to say.

I started kicking the big guy. Again and again.

At first he thought was just annoying. Then I started kicking even harder and that just got him even more annoyed.

"If you kick me one more time, little girl-" I started kicking him hard. Don't underestimate me.

"Call... me.... Little... girl.... One.... More... time... and... you.... Don't.... Wanna.... Know.... What... happens," I told him while kicking him in between each word.

He fell down, and before he could get up, I kicked him once more.

"If you want to live, I suggest you stay down there and chase after someone else." I said triumphantly.

"Let's go, Spooner! Unless you'd like the same treatment as our friend big guy here. No costs!"

"Hard pass, no thanks. And what's up with you today?"

"Period." I replied.

"Question mark?"

"My period."

"My question mark?"

I sighed. I pity the guy's girlfriend. I mean, if he ever gets one.

"Ohhh! I know what you mean now!" He said excitedly.

"Go for it, Spooner."

"Was it first period? Or third.... I know they're called blocks but..."

I have no hopes for this guy. The hope has a cherished into the deep deep dungeons of Askaban. For all the Potterheads out there.

"Just to let you know, potato chips have a very high source of saturated fat and can cause cancer. It is not healthy, and-"

"Thanks for ruining potato chips for me. I can't thank you enough. Now what am I supposed to eat now?"

"Cheeze-its?"

"Yea! Good idea. Good thing we haven't bought the potato chips yet."

"Did you know that Cheeze-its-"

"Don't ruin Cheeze-its for me too!" He groaned.

Ok then. I'll tell him another time.

"Just shush it, okay? Let's get your Cheeze-its, dummy!" I pushed him to go further, just in case we go colliding with another mentally insane guy. The mental hospital will realize he's missing. Soon enough. I hope.

"I'm so smexy." He said all of a sudden.

"Excuse me?"

"That stands for s-"

"Smiling idiot plus-"

"No, it's sm-"

"Smelly and saxophone-y?"

He sighed (at least now I'm taking his breath away now) and said "Maybe the guy could sense my awesomeness."

"In your dreams, loser." I replied.